GR
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:24:47 (EDT)

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you wanna dent up your fancy shmancy 2004 Accord fender? feel free to test its flimsy construction against my filthy girth
WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:20:21 (EDT)

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Is it true the Sizz only pr@ctices on sunny, warm days?
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:15:51 (EDT)

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ummm..I have a question...any reason all of us long pigs are sitting inside in front of hp comps instead of running naked down the streets in the fictonal cloud being's most glorious of weather events?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:09:10 (EDT)

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"MJ will blow you AND Wif for that monitor. "- For this you will never get anything ever. This crosses line by many miles. As a matter of fact THIS IS MY LAST POST EVER!!!!!
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:08:19 (EDT)

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Oh come on, like I'd really put my dog down for causing an itch. I'd have to put all my underoos down if that was the case. eeewwwww..... Besides I figured I could get one of you people to take the mutt If I really had a problem....
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:06:17 (EDT)

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Blame Don for instructing the BSTC to put up the squirrel and to change the background back to yella. Something about commemorating the beginning of the season...
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:05:26 (EDT)

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MJ gonna miss his rubbing his forearm on Mj breast to scratch itch...But that's great. be gone, exema! MJ will blow you AND Wif for that monitor. Sizz good for the dough.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:04:12 (EDT)

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umm...what's up with that squirrel? You do that again Chong and I'm gonna take away your feeding tube! I think my biter lived in a basement the first 2 years of his life. Could explain his desire to poop down there instead of going outside. Why don't you put that baby down in the cellar?
GR
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 14:00:50 (EDT)

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NOpe it's just bad exema(sp?). could be brought on by the dog but it wouldn't matter. I just picked him up and his skin looks as soft as, well, a baby's. And he didn't itch once all day! All smiles. On other note, looks like the sizz may be gettin that 23" monitor sooner than thought. Bro says they have one with a scratch ON THE BACK for same good deal. Will let you know tomoree. They still have to check with a few office peeps first.... Will come with a desktop of me puting down W!F with front fender of 2004 accord with NO STICKERS ATTACHED!!!
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:59:54 (EDT)

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Or... is that if you smell burnt toast...
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:57:32 (EDT)

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KOL, I'm pretty sure that a sneeze that smells like pine means you will be rocking soon
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:56:09 (EDT)

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Speaking of V!c, how are you, you prick?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:54:44 (EDT)

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I did it all for v!c you know......
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:54:01 (EDT)

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So glad to hear that Chong. So it's just the dog? I love that little kid. Yeah, I know, even tho MJ have heart like steel sewer cover, he still has a soft spot for the children and the animals.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:53:24 (EDT)

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Baby doin real good MJ. Went to skin doc and looks like he should be a lot better in a few weeks. Will make return visit so you can see him in a better mood. Not that he was all that bad. I'm guessin that was wiffy with the dead baby pic. I bet his hard drive is stuffed like a beaver with that kind of stuff.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:14:42 (EDT)

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that's the spirit! A for effort!
v!c
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:01:35 (EDT)

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Listen I have a serious question. What does it mean when your sneezes smell like pine?
KOL
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 13:01:17 (EDT)

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substitute chongling for baby
much hilarity
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:50:54 (EDT)

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here ya go chong
sweet dreams
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:41:16 (EDT)

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Well thanks for reminding me of my dead dog. Got any dead baby jokes to add to the hilarity?
WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:27:57 (EDT)

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KOL, not to make you feel bad or anything but if I had to put my biter down for biting I'da had her dead and buried 15 years ago.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:06:06 (EDT)

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I was wondering how the baby was. I've been thinking about the little dollin' all week.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:04:19 (EDT)

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I knew it, you prick. Thanks for upsetting half the world today. Well at least the half of the world that regularly reads the lurk anyway. You bastid.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:03:33 (EDT)

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Fuck you MJ. I did. I put him down...
chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:01:39 (EDT)

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I'm calling bulllshit on that story
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 11:56:08 (EDT)

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I'm calling bullshit on Chong's "I had to put my beloved dog down story"
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 11:55:33 (EDT)

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never did suspect I'd EVER see the phrase "need to examine as many cows as possible" even here on the lurk
WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 11:10:01 (EDT)

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in the spirit of lightening the tone...
Veterinary students are trained to palpate the bovine reproductive tract in order to perform pregnancy diagnosis and fertility examinations. These are difficult procedures to learn and require considerable practice to identify structures accurately. The teaching takes place both at university and during extramural studies (EMS) on farms with veterinary surgeons and students need to examine as many cows as possible to get the opportunity to develop skills adequately by the time of graduation. With regard to teaching, when a student is examining a cow the teacher is unable to observe the student's technique inside the cow and therefore, it can be difficult to instruct the student in the procedure.

WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 11:07:26 (EDT)

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Word to the Chong. Smoky went in my arms a year and a half back. sad sad sh!t
WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 10:47:01 (EDT)

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WTF. Yeah my feral cat's kidney's failed when he was 2, back in 2000 and I had to put him down. My favorite dog had to be put down at 3 (on the day after christmas mind you) for biting me and my sister within a 2 year span,so I got up 2 hrs before we had to take her to the animal hospital and played with her alone in the backyard. So, no I don't know what the fuck that is like or when anyone known for sarcasm or humor is being serious on a fucking goddamned internet message board .
KOL
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 10:33:28 (EDT)

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Yeah, I heard you are awesome at at both guitar and life.... And as to the rollover....if you are being sarcastic I'm not in the mood. I would guess you've never had to put a pet down have you?
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 10:10:07 (EDT)

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Have I told you lately that I rule?
KOL
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 10:05:41 (EDT)

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Well, that was just great. I just had to put my beloved dog down because the kid was severly allergic to her.....
Chong
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 09:41:55 (EDT)

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this lurk is sorely lacking; let's go people!
v!c
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 09:39:03 (EDT)

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Awsome NCAA finish last night. Were you guys watching something else?
yawn
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 09:19:59 (EDT)

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what? only 10-15 cases of torture and slavery a day? Them Saudis might fall short of being the murder monkey's ally if they keep up that slacker attitude.
WiF
USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 09:18:40 (EDT)

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Ahh so nice to be back in little Rhodekill..as long as I can stay drunk...took me about 3 days and some cashedin favors from the NSA to decipher your little rants,nice to see all your minds horribly deformed but well hidden."you're so fucking hot!"..I thought Dylan Thomas had taken the last tram to Clarkesville.Rehab....imagine sobering up only to realize you're Pat O'Brien?
Wndopain <wndopain@aol.com>
Barwick, ri USA - Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 04:09:08 (EDT)

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the only thing stupider than the yankees is pavement.
boris
- Monday, April 04, 2005 at 21:12:56 (EDT)

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howbout...FUCK the yankees.
boris
- Monday, April 04, 2005 at 20:17:21 (EDT)

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At least the Sox were nice enough to wrap things up by 9 so we could switch over to Desparate Housewives.
ed
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 19:12:05 (EDT)

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Fat dude ate my dog. Wheelchair and all.
drugsy
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 17:50:28 (EDT)

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So, anybody know the difference between the pope, some carrots and a dead pidgeon?
Rick Shaw
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 17:37:52 (EDT)

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...a cramped and bloated 57 year old with a leaky tampon?
MJ?
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 17:15:33 (EDT)

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.
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 17:11:12 (EDT)

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"At some point," said General Cullen, "I had to say: 'Wait a minute. We cannot go along with this.' " The two retired officers have lent their support to an extraordinary lawsuit that seeks to hold Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld ultimately accountable for policies that have given rise to torture and other forms of prisoner abuse.
WiF news ticker in effect
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 17:04:53 (EDT)

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a couple of highlights from the "alternative" annual report on Halliburton. Kinda makes it clear why Wolfowitz's next job is at the World Bank.
“The problem is that the good Lord didn’t see fit to put oil and gas reserves where there are democratically elected regimes friendly to the interests of the United States.”
– Dick Cheney, then-CEO of Halliburton, 199640
“We hope Iraq will be the first domino and that Libya and Iran will follow. We don’t like being kept out of markets because it gives our competitors an unfair advantage.”
— John Gibson, chief executive of Halliburton’s Energy Service Group, 2003.41

No corporation has benefited more from World Bank fossil fuel extractive project financing than Halliburton. Since 1992, the Bank approved more than $2.5 billion in finance for 13 Halliburton projects.82 ExIm is an even more significant financier of Halliburton’s global expansion. Since 1992, ExIm’s board has approved more than $4.2 billion for 20 Halliburton projects. Other U.S. taxpayer-financed institutions, including OPIC and regional development banks83, tossed in another $1.1 billion for Halliburton-related projects, bringing the overall total U.S. taxpayer-supported finance for Halliburton’s overseas projects since 1992 to more than $7.8 billion.
WiF
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 16:57:26 (EDT)

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Yo MJ- Shall we kick off the Spring longpig flesh-donor campaign? -under resources-
BUTCHERING THE HUMAN CARCASS FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION
...Body Preparation: Acquiring your subject is up to you. For best results and health, freshness is imperative. A living human in captivity is optimal, but not always available. When possible make sure the animal has no food for 48 hours, but plenty of water. This fasting helps flush the system, purging stored toxins and bodily wastes, as well as making bleeding and cleaning easier. Under ideal conditions, the specimen will then be stunned into insensitivity. Sharp unexpected blows to the head are best, tranquilizers not being recommended as they may taint the flavor of the meat. If this is not possible without exciting the animal and causing a struggle (which will pump a greater volume of blood and secretions such as adrenaline throughout the body), a single bullet through the middle of the forehead or back of the skull will suffice.
WiF of the season's first briquettes
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 16:44:49 (EDT)

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damn
spam
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 16:37:10 (EDT)

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LETS PLAY :) visit disney!
Tribal Crew <tribal@wildwildwest.com>
- Monday, April 04, 2005 at 16:29:45 (EDT)

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Speaking of "Absorbancy Ponygee"... what do you call a cramped and bloated 57 year old with a leaky tampon?
MJ®
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 16:11:34 (EDT)

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True story. A guy I grew up with had a religious experience at age 16, worked with Mother Theresa and met the Pope.
KOL
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:48:49 (EDT)

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and the other question
does Absorbancy Ponygee know of KOL's papal "connection"?
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:46:09 (EDT)

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Papal news scoop- pope's mystery cardinal's identity rooted out by this intrepid reporter

Papal Pooper Scooper
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:42:23 (EDT)

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The Pope just took a tram down to the river.
MJ®
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:26:52 (EDT)

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That Bob Marley post is so USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 13:22:44 (EST)
GR
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:20:42 (EDT)

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train fall down
go boom
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:14:02 (EDT)

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boni?
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 15:12:00 (EDT)

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I got a hot news anchor eye for the KOL guy
Boni
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 14:39:03 (EDT)

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The Rt Rev Gene Robinson, the Bishop of New Hampshire in the Episcopal Church of the United States, said that Jesus was an unmarried, "non-traditional man" who did not uphold family values, "travelled with a bunch of men" and enjoyed an especially close relationship with one of his disciples.
queer eye for the fictional cloud being guy
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 14:03:45 (EDT)

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I dunno. What's this?

USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 13:41:49 (EDT)

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yes, thank the fictional cloud being that the retina-burn red has gone the same tram route as the pope.
WiF
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 13:41:35 (EDT)

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what's this?

USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 13:29:37 (EDT)

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almost forgot to comment on the return to piss yella
v!c
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:47:57 (EDT)

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I fucking RULE. Scroll down to the last result in link!!!!!!! Offer still stands, 'boni baby!
Sneak
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:38:10 (EDT)

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BBC asks Bob Marley for interview
no interview no cry
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:35:26 (EDT)

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rumours that these tapes come from a certain Sorbonee's message machine remain unconfirmed.
cranking up the rumour mill
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:24:05 (EDT)

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quite possibly the worst attempt at phone sex eva...
Pat O'Brien sex tape. Apparently he's in rehab because these tapes surfaced.

fave Pat moment- "I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t fvking do this."
WiF
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:21:01 (EDT)

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Yup, they really gave them damn yankees a run for their money.
GR
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 12:14:05 (EDT)

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at least it was close last night
v!c
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 11:58:54 (EDT)

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Welcome to POPE TV! Yes, it's ALL POPE, ALL THE TIME!
WiF my tabernacle
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 09:34:07 (EDT)

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I see it's been noted that Pope John-Paul-George-Ringo took the breakfast tram down to Lake Welesa. And here I thought I'd have a big scoop to post.
WiF
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 09:30:11 (EDT)

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damn tram was busy this week.
Capt Obvious
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 09:24:22 (EDT)

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Ummm hello? buy a porsche.....

USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 08:23:33 (EDT)

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something just ate the b210 post?
harem scareum
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 07:26:44 (EDT)

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this website is sooooo 2002
ricky chang - chong lee's lawyer
USA - Monday, April 04, 2005 at 07:25:26 (EDT)

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60hp
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 23:42:53 (EDT)

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Same old fvcking Red Sox.
wait'll next year!
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 23:18:57 (EDT)

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Sin City is the absolute coolest film to come down the pike since, well, Pulp Fiction. Must see.
ed
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 17:43:12 (EDT)

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You better watch it bitch, or I'll have you on the next B210 down to the river!
The Pope
Benjamin, fish hatchery - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 16:23:10 (EDT)

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It's time to roll out the coffin, we'll have a coffin o'fun.
Polka Tram
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 15:11:33 (EDT)

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opening day muthafuckers!
Bazeball been verrry verry gud to me
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 12:21:08 (EDT)

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Dood, where's my pope?
Lonley Rope
USA - Sunday, April 03, 2005 at 10:40:19 (EDT)

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How am I supposed to jog in the a.m. and mosh in the p.m. with all this darn rain?
MJ®
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 22:54:01 (EST)

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Hey don,
MJ®
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 22:51:42 (EST)

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I don't want him, you can have him, he's too dead for me!
Polka Tram
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:43:45 (EST)

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Drugsy so funny cuz it's true...
chef
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:33:17 (EST)

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GR, while it would be fun to leave the island and see some of today's hottest musical acts, I can't leave the compound until the tax man comes
MJ®
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:29:00 (EST)

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I hope the next pope is gay!
MJ®
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:27:10 (EST)

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And I sincerely hope the next pope is from either Africa or China, which will drive all the evangelical/rapture nitwits completely off the deep end.
ed
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:19:17 (EST)

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Pope on the Polka Tram to Heaven.
ed
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 15:07:26 (EST)

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Cheffy's not a rock guy. He was in Neutral Nation.
drugsy
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 14:04:24 (EST)

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Yah, I just listed it on craigslist providence and had many replies. Seems like there are lots 'o places that allow dogs. Anyone up for seeing "The Man" John Doe tonight at the Narrows? Me wanna go. Trying to convince KOL he wanna go too. Too busy listening to Turbonegro to answer me right now though.
GR
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 13:07:33 (EST)

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chef pls remove the word "you're". thank you.
boofalo
- Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 10:52:51 (EST)

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Pope clinging to life. Generallissimo Francisco Franco still dead.
golden oldies....
USA - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 10:05:31 (EST)

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chef. first did you know it's spalled 'boiardi'. second, if you're smithfield and west is OK check out the Sun (or equivalent; free in most restaurants/gas stations/bars or 50 cents tops). also, if you can find one, the Bargain Buyer. lotsa ads not in the Urinal. most i've seen got no pet issues. sheeeeit, some say "horses ok".
buffalo boris
somewhere between 6 and 44, - Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 08:59:26 (EST)

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$1400 will get you a nice cardboard refrigerator box on North Main Street.
ed
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 23:56:51 (EST)

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Stinkin' Hippies!
chef
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 19:44:43 (EST)

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Mitch Hedberg just caught the tram...droppin' like fly's I Tells ya.
chef
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 19:44:22 (EST)

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MJ®
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 18:42:17 (EST)

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good god and good day
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 18:28:41 (EST)

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I need to rent (or buy) a house, almost anywhere, for under $1400, that will allow dogs...anyone, anyone?
chef
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 18:12:24 (EST)

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.... stop me if you heard this one before....
Moz
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 17:44:04 (EST)

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your @ss is SO struck by lightning
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 15:20:05 (EST)

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oops, wrong tram. I'm sure he'll catch the next one.
chef
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:48:48 (EST)

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get below me and let me bless you
Pope Halford
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:43:49 (EST)

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PJP rocks!
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:31:35 (EST)

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I hope I don't piss anyone off...
Sneak
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:19:26 (EST)

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Vatican denying Pope has boarded said tram of death.
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:11:43 (EST)

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doof, good point; EVERYBODY'S DYING!
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 14:05:09 (EST)

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Pope just jumped on the tram
chef
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 13:32:38 (EST)

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Uhh, yeah, I haven't been down to breakfast for 24 years. Leave me alone.
Robert Nesta Marley
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 13:22:44 (EST)

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Chicken McNoggin anybody?

USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 13:07:32 (EST)

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I totally missed the initial report of Frank Perdue'd untimely demise. Lame.
Is them real nuggets?
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 12:31:25 (EST)

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What's up? You free up your schedule yet or what?
KOL
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 12:24:18 (EST)

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Frank Perdue has taken the tram down to the lake. Please set out one fewer plate of chicken salad for lunch.
Plump Delicious Chicken
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 12:17:46 (EST)

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Did I ever tell you the time I met Don Doff!!!
Rick Shaw
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 11:49:42 (EST)

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Politicians are liars, music is lame and all sorts of people die.
doff
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 11:44:02 (EST)

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You're all just a bunch of
GR
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 11:39:04 (EST)

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Nah, this is just what the lurk looks like without any W!F nooze updates.
Rick Shaw
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 10:50:15 (EST)

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someone break the damn lurk?
v!c
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 10:41:15 (EST)

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you gots to love this salad cream

USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 10:24:17 (EST)

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For my money there is only one Banerjee.......
Rick Shaw
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 10:22:05 (EST)

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Too chicken to come down for breakfast...
Rick Shaw
USA - Friday, April 01, 2005 at 10:15:21 (EST)

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Hey I just found out who the Habs WERE going to take in the amateur draft!

The Fridge
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:45:03 (EST)

---

photo gallery of US Soldiers wounded "bringing democracy" (umm, I mean, "guarding oilfields") in Iraq.
ed
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:40:21 (EST)

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am concur on coffin fits
coughin' fitz
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:36:55 (EST)

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"You don't know God from Godzilla!"

I DO too know god from Godzilla. Godzilla is the megastar of a great series of films and god is a fictional cloud being who couldn't even wipe Gamera's ass.
WiF
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:34:54 (EST)

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Very few local TV people are from the area. Most of them are just passing through on their quest to get to New York or Los Angeles.
ed
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:33:55 (EST)

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Useless cunt Jerry Fallwell may not be coming down for breakfast in the near future.
TS
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:23:37 (EST)

---

cyclobenzaprine
cyclobenzaprine <Miff@mail.com >
NY, NY USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:21:58 (EST)

---

Damn confusing camera angles! Ok, how many of these girls in the contest are from Cranston/Johnston/N Providence?
Sneak
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:19:32 (EST)

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that "coffin fits" thing = funny; but I gots to tell ya Sneak, I saw Pam Watts on the tube LAST NIGHT and she's roughly the size of a refrigerator
v!c
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 09:13:37 (EST)

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Pope's just faking the feeding tube thing to garner sympathy for the rutabaga.
ed
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 08:51:19 (EST)

---

RJ Heim had to pull out of the competition. He had a yeast infection.
RJ's Ob-Gyn
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 08:49:12 (EST)

---

Chad McQueen quits acting.
Umm, was he in show business?
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 08:47:53 (EST)

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rj's a mite too purty
doris
- Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 07:34:08 (EST)

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VATICAN CITY (AP) - The Vatican says that Pope John Paul II is getting nutrition from a feeding tube through the nose.
pope on the juice pipe
USA - Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 06:23:33 (EST)

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Yo Face, how's your cellar?
basement tsunami don
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 23:14:44 (EST)

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re scroe: Where's PJ Heim?
doff
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 23:13:11 (EST)

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I still heart Irene Rodriguez.
ed
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 22:12:13 (EST)

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I heart Patrice Woods
smitten
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 22:05:52 (EST)

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The Score contest is fucking fixed. It's total BULLSHIT Pam Watts did not advance.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 21:19:12 (EST)

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i realize she's dung lee's buddy but....the Score contest is over. it's about allie's donuts. regardless, a damn fine contest it do be.

-Bayle Domon
 
- Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 19:51:26 (EST)

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"If the coffin fits, it's time to sit"
chef
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 19:41:58 (EST)

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I will return if you all make sure sorbange bnergee wins this thang....
chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 18:50:36 (EST)

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Cochran and Falwell in one feld swoop?! THERE IS A GOD!
v!c
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 18:29:37 (EST)

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Super what?
GR
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 18:14:22 (EST)

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rumor has it ol' Johnnie Cochran will NOT be down for super...cryin' shame too
v!c
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 18:12:29 (EST)

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Hi I'm new here. Your band is great! Well, talk to you soon. By the way. Did you know I'm Chinese?
Rick Shaw
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 17:08:13 (EST)

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Although I think his records aren't forthcoming because he was on the military payroll whilst being bush's softballer in the press room, it appears that....
Fake name. Fake reporter. Fake news agency. And now this ...
Fake Marine.
WiF
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 17:06:22 (EST)

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Fuck that cat, GR. You want this proud creature!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:55:54 (EST)

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and blame tom delay for the zombies headed to rhode island

WiF
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:54:42 (EST)

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alas, spam is a poor substitute for chong banter
blame MJ
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:53:01 (EST)

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Here is free dog. post skunking. pre beating with shoe.
Umm hello?
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:46:31 (EST)

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Please post photo of dog--always am basing my decision on looks!
GR
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:38:58 (EST)

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I'd answer your rollover but I'm NOT POSTING HERE ANYMORE!!!! AND I DID NOT DO THE DVD YOU VEGAMITE SANWICH!!! why don you shove note up feeding tube?
Chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:35:55 (EST)

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umm hello does anybody here know how to use Quicken 2005 for Mac?
MJ's accountant
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:34:26 (EST)

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Chong, before you leave forever, what are the abc6 referrals you speak of?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:33:26 (EST)

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I MISS CHEF!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:31:19 (EST)

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Chong, we're just jealous because you actually have friends. And many of them are pretty hot and young with nice smiles and skin. Also, I LIKE the dvd you made. I think I look not too shabby in it myself. You cut together some of my more flattering poses.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:30:48 (EST)

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I miss chong.
chef
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:28:28 (EST)

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This is my last post EVER! I am leaving due to the sorband banerjee stuff. You can all go to hell. So mean. I am hate you all. for serious
Chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:24:37 (EST)

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And, I know that I'll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way -- all of them who have tried to secularize America -- I point the finger in their face and say, "You helped this happen."
-- Rev. Jerry Falwell, blaming civil libertarians, feminists, homosexuals, and abortion rights supporters for the terrorist attacks of Tuesday, September 11, 2001, quoted from John F. Harris, "God Gave U.S. 'What We Deserve,' Falwell Says," The Washington Post (September 14, 2001)
american taliban = afghan taliban
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:19:28 (EST)

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Dear Sorboni Banerjee,
Pay no attention to these h8ers. I'd buff your muff all ruff n stuff, honey. Have you ever been in a lame 3-way?
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:12:30 (EST)

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pope's dead
chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:04:05 (EST)

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Oh and KOL/GR, I think you should really forward all mcfishcertificates to me. I need that stuff. I'll trade you my dog. Serious. I will.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 16:02:53 (EST)

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First, I did not make that I've told you that a thousand times! You are starting to make the schiavo look like the einstein. If you guys only knew how funny the abc6 referrals were you'd die laughing.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:45:47 (EST)

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DIE FALWELL DIE!!!!!
ed
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:44:47 (EST)

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Did Sorbonne Banerje wanna be your "babysitter" and I ruined it all?
don
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:33:38 (EST)

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HAHAHAHAAA! DONNY DON!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA! Hey Chong. Nice "Live at Lupos's" DVD. Where'd you make it?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:31:46 (EST)

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Oh, sorry MJ. I will change that as soon as I have the time. here's an old gem for doff. I hope it costs him the same social status that note cost me.....
Chong
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:26:57 (EST)

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BSTC the MFTC did good. on it.
doris
- Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 15:09:07 (EST)

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18 Things We Learned From The Schiavo Case
my fave #8- Cerebral spinal fluid is a magical potion that can mimic the entire functions of a missing cerebral cortex.
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 14:23:24 (EST)

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I think Chong has Phil Collins' autograph.
GR
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 14:20:24 (EST)

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GR and I are saving our McDinner certificates for a special occassion.
KOL
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 14:19:19 (EST)

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*Jack's Donut Barn used to be located on Metacom Ave in Bristol.
*Nota Benny
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 14:13:53 (EST)

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Congrats on Bristol geeg, KOL. Did you know that Jack's Donut Barn used to sell donuts that honest to jesus looked JUST LIKE hamburgers and hotdogs!!! it was SICK!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 14:06:48 (EST)

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funny thing is Don made new BS frontpage and mj have nothing to do with it so Chong fucked with the only rockstar he had an autograph of.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 13:59:12 (EST)

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Hockey game was fun the other night. I don't think I watched one play. I ran my mouth entire time. I was expounding on my body of work. I hate Chong.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 13:58:18 (EST)

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now here's one tram I'd like to see head down to the lake
may he fall well
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 13:28:25 (EST)

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NOOOOOO Tell him not to sell it!! :(
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 13:18:07 (EST)

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"There's No Business Like Schiavo Business" = best line I've heard in a long long time. Worthy of MAD Magazine. Kudos.
ed
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 13:01:05 (EST)

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Yo Sneak! Need a new commuter scooter?
doff 888
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 12:59:07 (EST)

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Cha-ching! Looks like the Schindlers are cashing in on their little rutabaga.
There's No Business Like Schiavo Business
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 12:51:34 (EST)

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Wait a minute, somebody figured out what gender Lester is?
not asking how
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 12:49:23 (EST)

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That personal ad is amazing. Too bad he's only looking for males.
TS
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 12:06:47 (EST)

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I'm not gonna lie. I check Craigslist every damn day for a burly Darth Gayder.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 11:50:02 (EST)

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that dick gere! a REAL cut-up!
v!c
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 11:36:03 (EST)

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Is it V!C?
McFish
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 11:34:25 (EST)

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3 guesses who's dancing with Prime Minister Koizumi

is that a gerbil corsage he's wearing?
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 11:29:06 (EST)

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and you were checking the men seeking men section becau..... nevermind
sum questions best left unanswered
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 11:27:11 (EST)

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This is the best personals ad. ever.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 10:45:04 (EST)

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This is the best personals ad. ever.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 10:45:04 (EST)

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TS, sounded like some foreign language to me too. I'm right on the Masshole line here. Thought I might have gotten mass local equivalent to your number. Maybe just sh!tty connection and my failing ears.
WiF
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:50:08 (EST)

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So MJ, would you say I look stunning?
sum swine
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:44:06 (EST)

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Actually, Drugsy, considering the fact that I owe the government money this year, I would rather talk about my taxes than have them done.
TS
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:42:12 (EST)

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"own" the longpig, revealing choice of word
death to the spawn of my loins
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:39:27 (EST)

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Let's hope for this some time soon.

USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:17:07 (EST)

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Step aside spam for some news of import. It seems Russell Crowe's band has called it quits. Rumor has it 156 people are on suicide watch. It appears they fear they may never ever be able to return the band's first album.
glad he ate her
USA - Tuesday, March 29, 2005 at 09:14:38 (EST)

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hahaha
funny paper indeed
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 21:30:30 (EST)

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in Asia no less

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 20:08:45 (EST)

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I saw the German film "Downfall" over the weekend. It's about Hitler's final days in the bunker as Berlin fell to the Soviet army. The most important thing I learned from it was that Eva Braun was a red-hot party babe.
ed
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 19:56:08 (EST)

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Okay MJ®, suffering is like a fully fronted Flava Flav blow job. So why haven't I entered the equation? Anywhere? From anyone?
Jack
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 19:39:09 (EST)

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I hope none of you lurkers ever have to watch your child starve to death before your very eyes. The beautful, beautiful sanctity of a marriage between a man and a woman, where the law and the fictional cloud being says the husband (who's already forsaken his precious, precious vows) owns the long pig over the long pig that birthed it.
MJ®
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 19:04:47 (EST)

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Welcome to Tax Talk with your boring host, Bobby Boring
sum jokester
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 18:15:01 (EST)

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let's talk about it 'til April 14th
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 18:00:37 (EST)

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Yo TS, do you want your taxes done or do you wanna talk about it?
drugsy
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:54:14 (EST)

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Someone just called me and I don't think they were speaking English. Was that you?
TS
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:49:34 (EST)

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401.226.5784
TS
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:49:03 (EST)

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Holy fuck. I just gave my 2 weeks notice.
KOL
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:31:56 (EST)

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Yo TS, just tried that number and got someone very NOT like you. Ring me back
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:06:46 (EST)

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there Is a certain irony to the fact that puking up her food is what led to them tubefeeding her
bulimia cafe
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:05:35 (EST)

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with time and the providence of the good Lord, Terri will be healed and back to dieting faster than you can say youth in asia
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 17:02:05 (EST)

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the tax man cometh
for yon ebayers
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 16:51:17 (EST)

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rutabaga vacancy evidence
not likely to see this one of Faux news
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 16:49:48 (EST)

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comin' for ya, Briefs...comin' for ya...

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 16:24:22 (EST)

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I'm not enough of a bottom feeder to blow you.
MJ clam...
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 16:00:52 (EST)

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blow me
MJ®
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 14:58:37 (EST)

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...and here's crap baby driving the Tram down to the lake.

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 14:41:50 (EST)

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bottom line explained

and as if that weren't bad enough
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 14:20:59 (EST)

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that tram car went down to the lake before they invented the wheel
talk about stale clams in the lakebed
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 13:59:05 (EST)

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Just to bring it back to me, I'll tell you what else just took a "tram down to the lake"
MJ®
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 13:21:33 (EST)

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Methinks "tram down to the lake" just got added to the list of lurkspeak
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:56:42 (EST)

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see 10:08:50 for that Crowded House public lynching
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:56:05 (EST)

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The drummer for Crowded House and the Guitarest for Foghat both took the Tram down to the Lake this weekend. No word on a return trip.
Can we bringback the Crap Baby?
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:54:17 (EST)

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new photoshop CS2 leaks
boris
- Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:45:40 (EST)

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tsunamis, tax forms, and popes, oh my!
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:39:08 (EST)

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So when's the pope gonna "take the tram down to the lake"*
doff
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:34:14 (EST)

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Oh, and fuck the IRS.
TS
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:32:09 (EST)

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I shall await your call then, Croc.
TS
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 12:31:52 (EST)

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BANGKOK, Thailand (AP) - Large earthquake recorded in Andaman Sea, Thai officials issue warning of possible tsunami.

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:57:30 (EST)

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nothing like aiding and abetting the Al Queda supporters to endear you in the hearts of the American Taliban
murder monkey travel agency at your service
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:56:18 (EST)

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meet the new boss
same as the old boss
so much for not getting fooled again
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:47:37 (EST)

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if i was w!f, i'd have an opinion on this
not w!f
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:45:36 (EST)

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That's an expensive suit hanging on a very un-lifelike mannequin
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:45:20 (EST)

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big "ups" if you can identify this next item...

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:40:48 (EST)

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nutter gets his

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 11:25:57 (EST)

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Easter Bunny Pummeled by Boy
nuff said
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 10:39:46 (EST)

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I dunno. Religious fanatic?

USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 10:27:35 (EST)

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Here's a shocker, the words "Tom DeLay" and "hypocrite" in the same sentence.

Both stricken patients were severely brain-damaged. Both were incapable of surviving without medical assistance. Both were said to have expressed a desire to be spared from being kept alive by artificial means. And neither of them had a living will.
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 10:20:00 (EST)

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what's with Aussie musicians and the noose?
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 10:08:50 (EST)

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fucking YAWN
v!c
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:54:49 (EST)

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example of chong lee social structure
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:54:21 (EST)

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social structure and chong lee in same post?
kick in the improbability drive
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:52:47 (EST)

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enter stage left, the pod people...

wishing I could crawl back into my pod
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:50:32 (EST)

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jeezus you people are only interested in destroying the social structure I have set up for myself. Why not you bring steve buscemi to YOUR FACE!!!!!!
Chong Lee
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:48:41 (EST)

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I thought you brought Steve Buscemi to the show.
GR
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:45:57 (EST)

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Ah, mystery solved. TS your number is almost the same as some else's that had called me incessantly on day in question (225 vs 226 etc). I'll call you and we'll figger out how to get me the numbers.
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:38:17 (EST)

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TS am call?
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:11:33 (EST)

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Congrats to Bryant for being #2 at #2.
WiF
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 09:10:01 (EST)

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Thanks again for the hockey game. I got so pumped up thinking about the game I hip checked GR into the side of her house, hard.
Sneak
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 08:25:26 (EST)

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That's a real funny piece of paper you got for your frontpage. Way to go.
Kilroy
USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 07:29:52 (EST)

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hgh
hgh <Seek@funmail.com >
NY, NY USA - Monday, March 28, 2005 at 03:19:11 (EST)

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I didn't even google this: "Loving You" (is easy cuz you're beautiful) by Minnie Ripperton. Not sure about the rest of her body of work.
MJ®
USA - Sunday, March 27, 2005 at 23:36:40 (EST)

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at The Call?
umm Hello
USA - Sunday, March 27, 2005 at 20:49:33 (EST)

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Hey Don, did you see this?
McFish
USA - Sunday, March 27, 2005 at 19:22:50 (EST)

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Say what you want, but you can't argue with my body of work...