Lurkive 20Jan–17Feb05

 


Arlen Specter has Hodgkin's disease.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 18:48:17 (EST)
Lestre that dutch kid is the funniest thing I've seen in a while and Mark Lebeau still sucks!
The Muddy one
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 17:07:04 (EST)
cursing rapping kid best ever
WiF
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:55:22 (EST)
Brian David Mitchell should remember that facial expression. He's going to be using it a lot when he gets to prison.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:53:53 (EST)
you can't top that rappin' fat kid from yesteryear...you just can't do it...not even the Dutchies can do it
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:52:28 (EST)
The fat Dutch kid is a LOT gayer than the Asian guys.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:50:13 (EST)
now THAT'S a preseason warmup
.
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:49:03 (EST)
BRAVO! there is nothin' and I mean nothin' like a horny donkey tryin' to fuck a fat dude
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:48:29 (EST)
and one more v!c, not @ss though
one word- FEATHERS!

swing batter
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:47:34 (EST)
Alright v!c, a couple @ss clips for ya.
j@p@nese @ss trick
@ss versus @ss

WiF
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:46:03 (EST)
uhm yeah, that's pretty gay
v
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:25:31 (EST)

s@y y@y @ss to g@y @ss
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:15:33 (EST)
join
The State of Sabotage
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 16:01:30 (EST)
The designer's toolbox is pretty nifty.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:47:34 (EST)
This fat dutch kid is all over the internet, so I'd might as well post it here.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:37:54 (EST)
When dry, if so much as a fly lands on the stuff, it will detonate, hence it's use as a convienent "boobytrap" compound ( I can hear the gears in your head spinning allready ).
hee hee hee
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:33:35 (EST)
This is the stuff we use to make in Junior High. Put this sh!z on zippers and wait for the fireworks

"For one thing, one could say that the reaction liberates a fair amount of energy,"

lucky to still have all my fingas
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:31:45 (EST)
for you fans of the red sox AND hockey, another curse to contemplate. In 1918 the Sox won the series, in 1919 there was no Stanley Cup, in 2004 the Sox won the series, in 2005 there will be no Stanley Cup. Prediction- Sox repeat and NHL folds this year, you heard it here first.
WiF of curses yet to come
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:27:39 (EST)
ok kids, this is how you make a bomb

USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:03:57 (EST)
gramma kicks cop's @ss
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:03:09 (EST)

I said I'm gonna be a STAFF reporter
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 15:02:59 (EST)
transformers + sextoys =
gandams? (work friendly... sorta)
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 14:46:55 (EST)
break out your color swatches, the alert system is about to start revving up the murder monkey attack quotient.
the faster we go the rounder we get
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 14:34:30 (EST)
when in doubt, sing the judge a lullaby...

USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 14:32:11 (EST)
nota bene magically glowing white slippers, lower left

USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 14:27:47 (EST)
You want Miami Vice the movie? I'll give you Miami Vice the movie!!!!
TS
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 14:22:36 (EST)
"Drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick."
The Guide
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 13:28:18 (EST)
double drat.
boris
- Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 13:27:59 (EST)
As long as Adams himself added the scenes, I'll trust his judgment.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 13:11:33 (EST)
this pic from this morning is already out of date. Time to add Syria and Russia to the pic.

way to go murder monkey
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:49:32 (EST)
Iran and Syria, both locked in rows with the United States, said on Wednesday they would form a common front to face challenges and threats.
gasoline meets fire
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:42:48 (EST)
And I heart Trot Nixon.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:41:20 (EST)
I heart Tim.
Dawn
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:27:11 (EST)
Ed, the thing I'm worried about is the addition of the brand-new Malkevich character. They say that Douglas Adams added the scenes specifially for the movie. Martin Freeman from "The Office" is perfect as Arthur Dent.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:25:06 (EST)
Also glad to see Disney moved Hitchhiker out of the highly competitive May 6th date (Ridley Scott's "Kingdom of Heaven", "Monster-in-Law" with JLo and Jane Fonda, and "House of Wax" with Chad Michael Murray and Paris Hilton) to April 29th where it only has to compete with xXx Part II. British humor has always been a tough sell here, and the film is going to need all the help it can get.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:18:26 (EST)
insert "after"

USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:08:26 (EST)
@ssclown dude = Andy Roddick about a case of beer
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:07:38 (EST)
And where is Zaphod's second head?
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:07:20 (EST)
"Here I am brain the size of a planet and they tell me to take you up to the bridge. Call that job satisfaction, 'cause I don't."
Marvin
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:06:29 (EST)
Great trailer, but I'm a bit concerned with the replacing of Stephen Moore with Alan Rickman for the voice of Marvin the Paranoid Android. Moore was just perfect.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:05:09 (EST)
"The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and cooperation. It will preserve and defend those basic principles on which our nation has been built. It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality, and the family as the basis of national life."
and would that be a quote from the murder monkey?
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:04:20 (EST)
you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses, would ya?

USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 12:02:17 (EST)
Kid Rock's been arrested and Yes, it was in a strip joint.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 11:53:31 (EST)
Clam Hunt
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 11:49:02 (EST)
Get your towels ready - Amazon premieres the "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" trailer.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 11:19:44 (EST)
In pharmacology, all drugs have two names - a trade name and a generic name. For example, the trade name Tylenol , is acetaminophen. Aleve is known as naproxen, Amoxil is amoxicillin, and Advil is ibuprophen. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After consideration by a team of experts, it recently announced it has settled on the generic name of mycoxafloppin. Also considered were mycoxafailin, mydixadrupin, mydixarizin, mydixadud, dixafix, and of course ibepokin. Pfizer Corp. is making an announcement today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. Pepsi's proposed ad campaign claims it will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously, we can no longer call this a soft drink. This additive gives new meaning to the names of cocktails and highballs. Pepsi will market the new formula by the name, Mount & Do. The long term implications of drugs and medical procedures must be fully considered. Over the past five years, Americans have spent more money on breast implants and Viagra than was spent on Alzheimer's research. It is believed that by the year 2030, there will be a large number of people wandering around with perky breasts and erections who can't remember what to do with them.
WR
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 10:53:32 (EST)
a story to warm MJ's cockles
the old grey paint ain't what she used to be
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 10:11:57 (EST)
Putin is putin it to
the murder monkey's plans
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 10:02:02 (EST)
"But we have no reason to say it's a hostile attack. There is a big possibility that it was a friendly fire by mistake. Several such mistaken friendly fire incidents have been reported there in recent days."
sh!t meets absurd explanation fan
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 10:01:09 (EST)
sh!t
meets fan
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 09:49:23 (EST)
Is it just me or is this a certain doff wearing a stunning necklace?

saying y@y @ss in my heart
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 09:42:07 (EST)
If Gannon's OK does that mean the lurk is Hooker friendly?

boom boom boom boom
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 09:39:20 (EST)
Dear Benny Sizzler, Please change name of song NYC Knife Fight to Newport City Knife Fight. I hear you Aquidneck Islanders like to go to extremes when celebrating Valentine's Day. "When two men go Valentine's gifts for the same woman, they wound up wielding knives and cutting one another."
WR
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 09:32:58 (EST)
Dude, gay friendly. Not gay porn friendly.
Chong
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 09:06:24 (EST)
So glad to know that while others scorn me, I'm welcome here on the lurk.

Guckert "The Cannon" Gannon
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 08:58:19 (EST)
I coulda been a contender
'cept I munched a gun barrel
USA - Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 08:53:23 (EST)
"War is much too important a matter to be taking sides".
Sargeant Schultz
- Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 08:02:48 (EST)
Hey MJ here's what your boyfriend's gonna look like at age 71...if he lives a clean, legal life like that of le old dood, shown.
boris
- Wednesday, February 16, 2005 at 07:37:03 (EST)
Note to lurkers. We are a gay friendly lurk. Remember the credo: g@y @ass =y@y @ss
Lurk Monitor
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 21:27:49 (EST)
quoth the dirty "that's the bitch!"
doris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 19:19:06 (EST)
Memo to f@t chicks: You're not supposed to wear belly shirts if you actually have a belly.
fashion faux pas
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 19:08:06 (EST)
this feller?

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 18:35:37 (EST)
nota bene vic droppin' his MAD POE CHOPS on our asses. very nice.
boris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 18:21:34 (EST)
nota bene the magically lighted sneakers, lower left
viiic
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:59:55 (EST)
too precious not to blow the eff up and post

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:54:11 (EST)
I like the way everyone has flash reflection in their eyes.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:54:08 (EST)
She's not moshing, she's retarded. Notice the lack of facial hair.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:52:49 (EST)
funny sh!t...look at the expression of horror on the dude right behind "moshing f@t g!rl"
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:42:51 (EST)

Uhmm, Hello?
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:39:50 (EST)
odd for religious Republican whack jobs to ignore scientific fact
ps
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:37:22 (EST)
In March 2001, President Bush also cited the "incomplete state of scientific knowledge" in renouncing the agreement (Kyoto Protocol), although the U.S. National Academy of Sciences subsequently endorsed the scientific consensus about the cause of warming.
vic tidbit
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:32:53 (EST)
I know what I need to access the Internet, but what do I need to access your heart?
A life.

that counts out the entire lurk
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:25:53 (EST)
Valentines redux. Or as my brother said, "happy v-d day"
WR
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 17:03:31 (EST)
Looks like Kerouac used the
dog ate my manuscript excuse
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 15:41:40 (EST)
Sounds like Michael Jackson is taking a page from the Raymond L. S. Patriarca playbook, who would mysteriously suffer a life-threatening "heart attack" just days before any time he was about to go on trial.
Bada-bing, bada-boom
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 15:29:23 (EST)
team of tailors working furiously to meet 26th deadline to get my fishnet stockings ready.

new meaning to long row to ho(se)
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:41:46 (EST)
whoever said "new meaning to Man Date" a couple days ago was funny.
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:31:20 (EST)
Sneak, there may be some sizing issues acquiring a jennie outfit of the necessary proportions.
do they even sell fishnet by the acre?
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:28:52 (EST)
no further explanation required

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:26:29 (EST)
My amusement at the idea of bush consorting with a guy who uses phrases like...
"AGGRESIVE, VERBAL, DOMINANT TOP"
and...
I DON'T LEAVE MARKS....ONLY IMPRESSIONS
seemed more amusing accompanied by said pics.

and be glad I only LINKED to the pee pic
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:24:56 (EST)
Wif, what they didn't tell you is that you have to dress like Jennie Creep onstage.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:24:37 (EST)
Was that sonnet sampler served by sum decommissioned Defecatur decanter?
just flexing my alliteration
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:18:46 (EST)
while a picture of Scott Stapp in g@y @ss necklace is fine and dandy, it doesn't begin to explain why you're posting g@y porn pictures on the lurk; also btw, Jeff Creep probably promises lots of things

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:18:37 (EST)
I ain't getting paid, but I am getting drunk. Jeff from the Creeps promised me admission and flowing beer all evening to handle the emcee-ing duties.
Tipsy on the drunken dole
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 14:14:45 (EST)
Do we get paid if we recite poetry? I almost gagged last night when my yoga instructor recited a Shakespearean sonnet during shivasana.
WR
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 13:53:02 (EST)
You may ask, why the long face? Well they were bred by the Romans to fight lions at the arena. With all that loose skin when an animal went for their heads theyd get a bunch of loose skin and the dogs still could turn their heads enough to go for the other critters jugular.

WiF of that there dog show
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 13:50:16 (EST)
"by the way WiF, why are you posting naked f@g pics on this here lurk?"


need I say more
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:50:05 (EST)
Miami Vice: The Movie
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:38:07 (EST)
by the way WiF, why are you posting naked f@g pics on this here lurk?
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:37:21 (EST)
it's official
FRANK IS DEAD!
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:28:47 (EST)
apparently Jackson was choking on his lunch of cumof sum yunguy
newsflash update
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:23:06 (EST)
this lurker may be going and may be reciting something nominally resembling "poetry"
Nipsy ready to discuss
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:21:13 (EST)
LV Vikings sounds fine to me. At least I'll know money won't stop them from getting the players they need. McCombs was just too damn cheap. I mean $750,000 for an NFL coach? (even if that is about all Tice is worth)
WiF = fat elvis in a viking outfit
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:18:18 (EST)
ok Lester, whatever

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:08:11 (EST)
NEWSFLASH -- Michael Jackson has been rushed to the hospital. No hyperlink yet.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 12:06:26 (EST)
Good question posed here. Kinda clears up some suspicions I've had about V!c and WiF.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:52:31 (EST)
I'd like to make it clear that that last "joke" had nothing to do with me.
chong
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:48:42 (EST)
Lester's dyslexia strikes again, he thought he was signing up for 'f@gs for sex'.
JERK O LURK
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:46:39 (EST)
I guess we'd better have a lurk discussion about the Living Room gig, you know, get on the same page as to which lurkers are going and which lurkers may be reciting "poetry" before each band.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:44:03 (EST)
"I joined 'Sex is for Fags' after watching girls who put out turn my big brother into a major wuss. By learning to repress my urges, now I can to grow up and be what I always wanted: a prison guard or a priest."
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:35:14 (EST)
Najai Turpin is down for the count and will not be down for breakfast.
quick, call my bookie
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:32:11 (EST)
Yankees knew Giambi was juicing when they signed him.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:31:21 (EST)

I would pay to see this
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:30:24 (EST)
WtF, three words: Las Vegas Vikings
doris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:30:06 (EST)
If Monica Lewinsky was such a heinous, impeachable offense, what's it going to take to impeach Bush for having a male whore on the payroll? I can't wait to hear DeLay explain this one away.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:28:22 (EST)
Somehow I fear the press is going too be busy covering every nano-second of the Michael Jackson trial to pay ANY attention at all to the Guckert scandal, and once again the Bush junta will skate as this "episode" quickly fades from the public consciousness.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:26:38 (EST)
don, spallcheck my face.
boris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:25:55 (EST)
Mmmmmm....Now THAT'S a penis!
Dubya
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:23:53 (EST)
forgot the Guckert stuff link
dog bless the blogosphere minions
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:17:54 (EST)
more from the bush's gay-escort-pal front. Gives a whole new meaning to someone giving bush a softball... question that is. Here's Guckert/Gannon's self-description...

The “Ammunition” section contains the description of the escort. It reads: White, 200 pounds, hair “high and tight,” chest “46’ Usually Shaved or Clipped,” and under “Weapon” it says "8 inches cut."
Ex-USMC Jock: Available for hourly, overnight, weekend or longer travel - OUT ONLY!
Personal Trainer: Safe-Sane-Strenuous-Satisfying workouts, Sports training, and competition, especially wrestling....
Big SPORTS Fan: Will go to the game with you, then take you home and....
"AGGRESIVE, VERBAL, DOMINANT TOP"
I DON'T LEAVE MARKS....ONLY IMPRESSIONS

"It's looking increasingly like they made a decision to allow a hooker to ask the President of the United States questions. They made a decision to give a man with an alias and no journalistic experience access to the West Wing of the White House on a "daily basis." They reportedly made a decision to give him - one of only six - access to documents, or information in those documents, that exposed a clandestine CIA operative. Say what you will about Monika Lewinsky - a tasteless episode, "inappropriate," whatever. Monika wasn't a gay prostitute running around the West Wing. What kind of leadership would let prostitutes roam the halls of the West Wing? What kind of war-time leadership can't find the same information that took bloggers only days to find?"

and here's a peek at who the White House is giving access too nowadays

and bush's boytoy full spread eagle
and what could possibly be more arousing than a phony journalist pizzing?

WiF of azz from the oval office
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:15:38 (EST)
Fuck the Jay, Tigers, Yankees, and Man U. Watch out for the Mighty Mighty MILWAUKEE BREWERS and their "marquee game pricing"!!
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:10:46 (EST)
And fuck whoever insinuated that I eat garden burgers!
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:07:13 (EST)
Haven't been to the "encased meat emporium" yet. It just opened about a mile from my brother's house. I'm damn sure I'll stop by Hot Doug's this summer when I go see the RED SOX play at WRIGLEY.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 11:05:46 (EST)
Good news on the realsport front
just you wait till next year...... again
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:58:05 (EST)
damn boris that's the longest undie-smear you've left on the lurk in ages.
boris has a yawnball woody
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:53:55 (EST)
you would know how to spell that you leaky fuck.... I'm not changing it anyway. why don you go spellcheck your face?
chong
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:53:55 (EST)
Bacon double chee w/ the works, make it two of 'em, on the double please and thank you. I will drive for that. I will. Problem is this. Every dumb@ss drunk frat boy downtown has worked up a mean hunger over lo those many pitchers of Bud Lite. Drunk frat fucks form lines when cornered at the Haven.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:51:31 (EST)
Wicked absorbent wicked spallcheck.
boris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:51:01 (EST)
Does anything warm your left leaning heart more than Republican off-spring gone gay?

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:46:37 (EST)
it was close. it was good. now it's out of the way. probably never go to haven again.
William Radcliffe
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:29:35 (EST)
I will admit that back when the Met was still the "Cask of Amontillado" I was know to "Burg Up" heavily at the burger Haven.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:26:02 (EST)
Nah, he's to busy drinking in the alley...
Blobby
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:05:35 (EST)
So Lester, have you been to the "encased meat emporium" yet?
TS
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 09:03:14 (EST)
yeah and he hit .265 last year..... way 2 go mets!
Durrrrrrr
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 08:47:44 (EST)
uhhh....3-year total salaries raised to $210 mill. wow i guess. but isn't that what beltran's getting?
 
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 08:19:38 (EST)
The Detroit Tigers spent some cash, I know that.
rumford divided
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:59:30 (EST)
Hey Mean Joe, I didn't mean to rat you out with all that back-acne-equals-juicer talk. Sorry dood. My bad.
Jose Canseco
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:57:01 (EST)
actually didn't i hear a story about the jays' owner opening the purse strings for this season? i think everybody laughed because even though it was a good amount of dough, all the good free-agents are gone. i mean shit, even randy 'i lack knee cartilege' went somewhere....
dirty
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:55:34 (EST)
you dick

USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:45:12 (EST)
Imagine if the blue jays all of a sudden had a 300 million dollar payroll next year...... Would sox and yankee fans complain? Yeah, it's like that.
rumford divided
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:41:56 (EST)
there's plenty o' chelski vitriol left over. they're the yankees to my side, that's for danged sure. funniest thing is listening to gooner and reds fans complain about the money chelski's spending. i'd feel genuinely bad if the reds sell to this midget vermin.
boris
- Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 07:37:31 (EST)
Hate Arsenal and ManU all you want but Chelsea are the real Yankees of the EPL. They have spent 250 million in the last few years on transfers alone. That is more than double the combined spending of the other two.
Rumford Divided
USA - Tuesday, February 15, 2005 at 05:44:23 (EST)
i'm both dirty and old. rumor has it this band's name has been changed to the Los Angeles Benny Sizzlers of Middleblob. is this true.
doris
- Monday, February 14, 2005 at 19:40:44 (EST)
For first time in 119 years, Arsenal has no British players.
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 18:36:39 (EST)
"I guess," Rory said, "I have reached a point in life where I am a dirty old man. Or maybe I always was a dirty man and now I am just old."
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 18:23:33 (EST)
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA whoever you are. God wicked punished you! WR, is the book "A Bird for Peter?"
MJ®
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 17:16:06 (EST)
blasted cave man html skills...
fuck me
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 17:06:13 (EST)
MJ's first porno mag!
img src="http://www.research.fsu.edu/researchr/summer2002/images/tablet.jpg">
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 17:05:38 (EST)
unfortunately ed, the ignorant fat fvcks breed like chiggers on a dog's back in the summer...sadly, you'll run out of lard before to finish 'em all off
v!c
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:57:54 (EST)
Can't believe how many of those issues from '68 to '76 I owned. Wish I still had 'em.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:51:08 (EST)
thank you for taking the time, Boris. But no, it is not a separate peace. Still working on it though. Asked patron for more clarification and all she could come up with was that there was a psychiatrist's office!
WR
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:44:56 (EST)
there seems to be something else going on in this pic besides the cleavage

but I can't quite make it out
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:31:46 (EST)
number 171 still has a ring of truth to it too.
the faster we go the rounder we get
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:28:31 (EST)
wake....not knowles' a separate peace?
doris
- Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:25:51 (EST)
nota bene- that pic is when they were BUILDING the tower NOT from when it came down.
a rosetta stone by any other name
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:25:30 (EST)
cover of Babylon Monthly from MJ birthdate

special 50 pound issue
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:23:33 (EST)
The greatest MAD cover of all time is #142 from April of 1971. It is still relevant today as well.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:21:26 (EST)
yup there really is a custerbattles, but I still say they have to be phony names. These guys must have been real sweethearts in the genocide down in Central America under raygun or some such to end up with new personas.
check out the different "services" they offer
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:17:50 (EST)
How many Marlboro Miles do you need for an iron lung?
wet, wheezing, hacking cough
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:14:14 (EST)
They didn't have Mad magazine when MJ was born. They had Bubonic magazine back then. Is there really a Custer/Battles co in Middleblob? High fiving bros in newport is VERY funny audience characterization by KOL
MJ®
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:12:12 (EST)
cool ! heres mine!
Face!
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 16:02:54 (EST)
here's the cover from the month I was born, and...

here's every single cover of Mad magazine (best find since Wacky Packages)
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:57:19 (EST)
check out the nifty Marlboro Ipod cover
cancer + hep player = die in style
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:49:28 (EST)
Ed yer a funny mudda fugger :)
Old Fot Neighbor
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:42:31 (EST)
Speaking of the Hamdog -- I have found Heaven on Earth, and it is called "Hot Doug's"
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:25:19 (EST)
Re: "Kid confuses parents' sex act for domestic abuse, shoots father." - Let's hope these are people who are against sex ed classes in school.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:17:38 (EST)
Nothing wrong with the Hamdog at all. In fact, we should start a marketing company to advertise the Hamdog in every Red State in the country. The sooner all those fat, ignorant Southern fvckers die of heart attacks, the better. A good start would be putting a Hamdog stand in every NASCAR venue in the country.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:10:35 (EST)
I'm going to take a wild guess that John Harwood is somehow involved with Custer Battles.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:06:40 (EST)
Dick Weber will not be down to pick up the 7 - 10 split in the morning.
ed
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 15:05:42 (EST)
U.S. spent $300 billion to elect Iranians to rule Iraq.
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 14:26:10 (EST)
will the NHL play next year? apparently nobody cares.
to the tune of 67%
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 14:14:51 (EST)
damn, those guys are full out wacko mercenaries.
can custer and battles really be their real names?
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 14:10:58 (EST)
oops, look like some local boys made the news...

Describing the transfer of $2 million to one contractor's gunnysack, Willis said: "It was time for payment. We told them to come in and bring a bag." He said the money went to Custer Battles of Middletown, R.I., for providing airport security in Baghdad for civilian passengers.

that flushing sound your hear is your tax dollars
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 14:03:27 (EST)
this is how I prefer my heart

USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 13:31:20 (EST)
looks like others share our opinion of valentines.

hunkahunkaburninglove
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:53:15 (EST)
If you lay down with murder monkeys...

you end up with car-b-que fleas (yup that's him)
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:38:13 (EST)
I could "handle" a hamdog, but I doubt you'd ever catch me eating one.
prefer murdering lobsters
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:35:50 (EST)
"Queer beer" hits the shelves. Available in bottles or in the can.
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:23:05 (EST)
"Drop by to witness the branding and cleavage of Jeff Bagwell's ex-wife."
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:14:45 (EST)
WiF, think YOU could handle the HAMDOG?
v.
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:13:27 (EST)
Nope. I saw Herb there at the end of the night.
the cunt
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:12:34 (EST)
Kid confuses parents' sex act for domestic abuse, shoots father.
Lester
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:11:02 (EST)
WiF, what that article doesn't mention is that the pipeline had just been made opperational on Friday after the previous attack in September. So they got a good 2 days of crud(e) out of it.
doff
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:10:58 (EST)
When Becky Cleaveland is out with her girlfriends, they all pick at salads except for the petite Atlanta woman. She tackles "The Hamdog." The dish, a specialty of Mulligan's, a suburban bar, is a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries. "The owner says I'm the only girl who can eat a whole one without flinching," Cleaveland said proudly.
what, no mayonaisse?
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:06:27 (EST)
Herb, perhaps? And I don't mean Alpert.
v!!!c
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 12:05:16 (EST)
The really drunk guy who got in the fight was the same guy who used to yell 'HERE I COME AGAIN BAY-BEE!' loudly between songs when the Heaters used to play 3s/craigs. Same fucking guy. 7 years later.
KOL
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:45:36 (EST)
thanks to those lurkers that showed up on time Saturday night as well as those that did not show up on time...along with the brawlers, and the cops, and the high ratio what's up dudes.
v!c
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:14:21 (EST)
All righty then. Here's a work related question for any lurkers with a taste and memory for bad fiction from perhaps the 1980s. Anyone know of a book about 2 children who meet up with a psychiatrist who then spend their lives together and when only the boy (?) is left he says something like "I am left to be the rememberer"
WR
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:11:54 (EST)
my nuts have chewy centers?
who's been munching my nuts?
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:11:38 (EST)
the return of the no brain no pain debate. nothing like cruelty to crustaceans to stir up my appetite.
somebody get the drawn butter ready
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:09:30 (EST)
I'd like to order three boxes of Wifman's nuts and chewy center sampler please?
Mr. Lonely Hearts
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 11:02:55 (EST)
Found this site that writes a valentine story for you. I filled in Friend’s name- Mr Death, Your name- Satan, and Your school’s name- The 1st circle of Hell. yielding...

...Satan opened Valentines but also watched Mr Death. Finally, Mr Death read the special Valentine. A very big smile came over Mr Death's face. Then Satan and Mr Death looked at each other and burst out laughing! Want to know what the special Valentine said?

now it's your turn boys and girls
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 10:17:35 (EST)
OK, quiz time. Is this a pic from...


the phillipines?
Lebanon?
or Iraq?

murder monkey must be having a mucho mirthful morning
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 09:29:48 (EST)
On this sainted day may I wish that all yon lurkers be given some arsenic bonbons by someone who loves them enough to hasten their meeting with death's sweet embrace.
WiFman's sampler available in aisle 5
USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 09:25:23 (EST)
I felt the same way about smear.

USA - Monday, February 14, 2005 at 08:51:36 (EST)
X: "don is a cunt" Y: "yes he's a cunt, but he just threw up in his mouth"
celtica
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 22:17:15 (EST)

nuff said
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 21:10:05 (EST)
• Fear and aggression
• Dogmatism and intolerance of ambiguity
• Uncertainty avoidance
• Need for cognitive closure
• Terror management

enemy redux
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 21:09:29 (EST)
"We decided to have a blood drive," Ceci said, "So that Ann could renew the unholy forces which animate her flesh by bathing in the blood of the innocent.
Ann Coulter's "beauty" secret
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 21:07:59 (EST)
Motormags audiences have the highest what's-up-bro handshake ratio per attendee of any band I have ever seen, with the possible exception of a darkbuster show. And they rocked saturday, very much.
Sneak
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 20:56:11 (EST)
This week, the Republicans introduced a $2.5 trillion budget that deliberately conceals the cost of their fiscal recklessness. Their budget doesn't account for the cost of the war in Iraq, or privatizing Social Security. It cuts education, children's health, veterans benefits, and community policing. As far as I'm concerned, this budget does only two things: It brings Enron-style accounting to our nation's capital. And it demonstrates what Americans are beginning to see: Republicans cannot be trusted with your money.
YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH!!!!!!!
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 20:39:09 (EST)
Heard this comment in a pub a few hours ago " Since Muddy Briefs left the band, all the bollocks went out of it."
Ronnie Drew
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 17:38:53 (EST)
Anything followed by "am hate" anything else = 2nd funniest lurk running joke ever.
VH1 Top 20
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 15:46:45 (EST)
What's number 2?
Larry Rivers
Neponset, MA USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 11:24:24 (EST)
"in prison" = 3rd funniest lurk running joke of all time.
VH1 top 20 countdown
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 09:42:41 (EST)
i heart dialup donn-zoil. hope you're wrong but there can't not be huge changes at this point, am guessing. "get rid of teams in non-hockey cities" makes sense?? like....tampa? oy.
doris
- Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 08:21:49 (EST)
Okay, so I finally find an absorbent enough blob hammock, I strap it on and don and mj make their way down to the OTHER band's big gig. Completely miss the show and apparently KOL, WR AND ed as well. All whored up and everything. Club closes, I get thrown out. Go home. Replace blob hammock. Bummed. Word has it the other b@nd rocked. They got 300 bucks and the place was packed. I got 300 bucks once
MJ®
USA - Sunday, February 13, 2005 at 01:45:26 (EST)
Hey wait a minute...do you mean MY island? oh fuck...rocker invades the Isle of Aquid. hey I'm going too. As long as I can get a blob hammock absorbent enough (like the song says)
MJ®
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 18:57:55 (EST)
Getting ready to make the BIG TRIP TO THE ISLAND.
Sneak
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 18:23:45 (EST)
double dirty double post. b's last as the nhl shant return. despite what super mario says.
doff
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 18:17:39 (EST)
i was online last night?

actually the coolest was the guided tour of the Dunk's innards by the house engineer. HVAC, cooling, ice-making etc. They can gauge the ice's thickness at any one point to within 1/64th of an inch, as well as temperature. Hockey temps are far higher than, say, figure skating temps. Once the season starts they only melt the ice completely about 4 times 'til end of season. most difficult gigs are monster trucks....venting exhaust and avoiding mega-clogging of all ductwork with dust and dirt. mental note: there is never a good reason to drink well gin at the Dunk. ever. what else? uh...toivonen's aboot 6-5 and plays almost exactly like saint patrick with the butterfly. last ever don? hey if molson can merge with coors, anything is possible. but that is wishful thinking on your part, laddy. file under "we can beat man u".

dirty
- Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 17:36:27 (EST)
i was online last night?

actually the coolest was the guided tour of the Dunk's innards by the house engineer. HVAC, cooling, ice-making etc. They can gauge the ice's thickness at any one point to within 1/64th of an inch, as well as temperature. Hockey temps are far higher than, say, figure skating temps. Once the season starts they only melt the ice completely about 4 times 'til end of season. most difficult gigs are monster trucks....venting exhaust and avoiding mega-clogging of all ductwork with dust and dirt. mental note: there is never a good reason to drink well gin at the Dunk. ever. what else? uh...toivonen's aboot 6-5 and plays almost exactly like saint patrick with the butterfly. last ever don? hey if molson can merge with coors, anything is possible. but that is wishful thinking on your part, laddy. file under "we can beat man u".

dirty
- Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 17:35:24 (EST)
Fox sports world now fox soccer channel. Nothing really changed though.
hip hooo rayy...hip hooo raaayy!!!
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 14:50:04 (EST)
Last night was RAD! Cjr cried for two hours straight! Is there still a black market for such things?
Chong
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 11:36:41 (EST)
need i remind doris of the b's final playoff series - ever?
doff
USA - Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 11:26:53 (EST)
vic, for you, muffin, i ordinarily would. you know it's true. not for that fuckteat don, ever, but for you absolutely.


toivonen registered a skunk (first place teams called manchester anything are suspect) and paaahhh-TREEEES bear-gere-on kicked ass. so haiku-wise all i can say is:

i am fucking DRUNK
blake's now has a backroom, wot?
habitents blow goat.

and to all a g'night...

dirty
- Saturday, February 12, 2005 at 00:56:14 (EST)
I 'll just set here then, filling my suicide scrapbook with pictures of what could have been and happier days when I was a child with clear skin and mother was there and father too
Miss Lonelyhearts
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 18:32:08 (EST)
Feb 14 = SAD Day = 'Singles Awareness Day' Day
v!c
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:24:38 (EST)
And unfortunately, cooking means cleaning first. Maybe I'll get home-baked cookies for valentine...er...evil made up saint's day
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:23:16 (EST)
I'll see any of you lurkers that dare cross yon bridges tomorree night. You others? I'll just see you around. Good day. ps Chong, if you want the expensive food minus the attitude and WITH good service, try TUCKER'S right next door to Starvation.
v!!!c
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:23:03 (EST)
FYI for those needing Valentine's day presents.
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:21:45 (EST)
I was wondering where they up n' got to.
viiic
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:20:24 (EST)
WR, it happens. Here's what you do. You go home. You bake yourself a couple two three dozens worth. You pull up a chair, turn on Dateline. Dig in. What's that gotta do with this picture? About as much as with one of Dirty's dirty haiku.

USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:18:38 (EST)
Some are labeled "Aid for Tsunami Victims," but their contents — winter jackets, expired cans of salmon, stiletto shoes, winter tents, thong panties and even Viagra — have left Sri Lankans scratching their heads.
v!c was just trying to help
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:17:43 (EST)
besides, how does one keep in touch via the interweb when one is dead?
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:03:07 (EST)
I know, I just wanted to be snotty. No, I don't want to be snotty anymore. Well, I guess I'm just confused is all. And tired, and cranky, and fed up, and hungover, and and and
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:02:02 (EST)
saw this line elsewhere...
After The Rapture, we get all of their stuff.
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 17:01:48 (EST)
shoulda guessed I'd find the pic

would you let this man organize your suicide?
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:52:12 (EST)
Caught a pic of that clown's homestead. you could clearly make out a Fife Security Agency sign (with pic of the fearless Barney) in his window.
make him watch andy griffith till his eyes bleed
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:49:49 (EST)
This here guy? I call him De La Sole.

USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:46:06 (EST)
WR, I believe you asked me so. It was my duty to confirm. Dirty Doris, do share one of your twisted dirty Jap Hi-Ku.
viiic
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:41:57 (EST)
kinda looks like the guy what books all benny's shows...
no joke
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:40:25 (EST)
February 5, 2005 - Feverish gig preparations, feverish loading of equipment, gig, feverish loading of equipment back into basement.

USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:39:18 (EST)
speaking of suicide scrapbooks, there's 32 people that'll have to rearrange their Valentine plans
I heart the deaths of all longpigs
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:38:21 (EST)

DO IT NOW!!
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:34:43 (EST)
Dear lurkers, the good captain is very busy putting together Benny's Suicide Scrapbook. Very soon you will be able to view pictures of yourselves and others on this very website. Please stand by
BSTC
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:32:55 (EST)
time for a lurk testicle update-

She grabbed him by the genitals, tearing off his left testicle, then hid it in her mouth before a friend of Jones handed it back to him saying "that's yours."

he "has been caused to sustain severe and permanent physical and emotional injuries, including but not limited to the loss of plaintiff's testicle, as well as residual disfigurement, scarring and pain."

two gonad stories for the price of one
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:26:49 (EST)
have spent some of my day creating variegated and violent anti-Beck haiku. it has been rather a good day.
boris
- Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:18:52 (EST)
told you so
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:14:35 (EST)
The woman CNN was praising this morning for being a good samaritan and "rescuing" a newborn who was thrown from a car, turns out made it up
throw mama from the train
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 16:10:21 (EST)
picture of pope at bottom of front page of today's BlowJo father forgive me but very much Special Ed.
viiC
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:56:51 (EST)
turns out it IS the same building, who'd'a'thunk'it
ps
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:51:56 (EST)
Celtica
mapquest directions
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:34:08 (EST)
oops linked to the wrong article on truthout, that one is about the same subject but here a taste of the intended article...

Scientific research on the efficacy of torture and rough interrogation is limited, because of the moral and legal impediments to experimentation. Tom Parker, a former officer for M.I.5, the British intelligence agency, who teaches at Yale, argued that, whether or not forceful interrogations yield accurate information from terrorist suspects, a larger problem is that many detainees "have nothing to tell." For many years, he said, British authorities subjected members of the Irish Republican Army to forceful interrogations, but, in the end, the government concluded that "detainees aren't valuable." A more effective strategy, Parker said, was "being creative" about human intelligence gathering, such as infiltration and eavesdropping. "The U.S. is doing what the British did in the nineteen-seventies, detaining people and violating their civil liberties," he said. "It did nothing but exacerbate the situation. Most of those interned went back to terrorism. You'll end up radicalizing the entire population."

THIS is the New Yorker article
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:30:55 (EST)
WR, your are in the right neighborhood...though not sure same building itself...as for bassist, one Dylan Roy will be providing the low end boom.
v!c
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:23:29 (EST)
And the blogosphere collaborative investigation of Guckert/Gannon has spawned a whole new type of news organization.
And they've decided to make it a going concern (WOOHOOO for the good guys)
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:19:34 (EST)
How about bush's pals giving a half million to Al Queda, you think that rates as newsworthy here in the states?
apparently not it's only in overseas press
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:16:50 (EST)
and the full schnizzle from next week's New Yorker on the secret history of America's "extraordinary rendition" program.
outsourcing torture and other flights of "fancy"
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:12:08 (EST)
Any government that commits, condones, promotes or fosters torture is a malignant force in the world. And those who refuse to raise their voices against something as clearly evil as torture are enablers, if not collaborators. There is a widespread but mistaken notion in the U.S. that everybody seized by the government in its so-called war on terror is in fact somehow connected to terrorist activity. That is just wildly wrong.
the short and sweet article
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 15:09:02 (EST)
what is up with that Cowsill dude? Aquidneck Islandahs? Any ideas?
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 14:45:10 (EST)
Whoever said this about Camilla: "She's a MAN baby" =funny
a day late and a lurk short
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 14:18:45 (EST)
I'm fresh out of the pills ed (been eating them hand over fist) but I do have some extra strength fuckitol handy. Just one pop and your mind is clear of all troubles.

WiF
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 14:17:25 (EST)
The ole Narragansett Cafe?
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:49:57 (EST)
MMMM...remember the Salvation Bowl? I do, fondly. Oh I think there will have to be some stomping on Chong's parade tomorree! Maybe a blowpop or two thrown in the back (dress warmly--those kerosene heaters ain't all that good).
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:48:41 (EST)
more from the rfid front
they ARE watching your EVERY move
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:37:15 (EST)
Gotta admire any guy smooth enough to nail Marilyn Monroe.
ed
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:37:02 (EST)
So does this make Jose Canseco the Johnny Thunders of major league baseball?
ed
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:32:25 (EST)
scab-TASTIC!!!!

"They understood the position on both parts, but they weren't able to offer anything that would act as a solution," said Daly, who said the league may have several options to consider. "Obviously, once the season is cancelled it's our desire to continue to negotiate and try to find a solution. That has been our focus throughout this process and it will continue to be our focus. That being said, we have to look at what our alternatives are. We have many options and I'm not going to say what those are or whether they include replacement players. What I can say is we will look at all our alternatives."

boris
- Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:02:02 (EST)
yeah

USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 13:00:56 (EST)
Yes. I shall be celebrating this exalted day performing a solo version of the Rush masterpiece '2112'. I do remind you that I have yet to find musicians worthy of the brotherhood of rock.
Emperor Darwin
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:48:14 (EST)
The Shill is donating this bloody rag to the Baseball Hall of Fame...I think they should just throw it in the wash.

USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:47:53 (EST)
Some of it is a bit pretentious, but for the most part, the menu tells you everything that's in a particulr dish. So if there's something you don't like in a dish, well, stay the fuck away from that dish. I recommend the chicken enchilada or the pad thai. The vegetable nori rolls are pretty good, too. Just don't go looking for a cheeseburger.
UBMBT
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:46:25 (EST)
It's Darwin Day tomorrow in honor of his birthday. So don't forget to b!tchslap any members of the American Taliban that you meet.
WiF
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:45:53 (EST)
here's the real deal: Starvation Cafe does have decent food if you can stand the lousy service and hipster Newport attitudes (I > you); Sully's is a long forgotten memory - your hometown favorites Benny is NOT playing but your second favorites sons the motormags ARE...at Celtica (Sully's siamese twin brother removed at birth) 95 Long Wharf, Newps...tuneage from 10-12
v!c
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:43:08 (EST)
I hope its not one of those places where every entree looks great BUT something ridiculous is added for 'creativity' therefore just about ruining it..
Sneak.ol.
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:39:43 (EST)
The Salvation is great. For drinks. Get a chocolate cake shot. It's the official drink of the Suicide Liquors. In fact, QOC is all in a tizzy because Complete Blurr is instituting it as a Decatur drink as we speak, which has lead to a sudden increase in the amount of Frangelico she has to buy. Boy, is she miffed.
As for food...well, yeah it's kind of expensive, but they make an appetizer with tomato bisque and these tiny, silver-dollar sized grilled cheeses. Try splitting one of those four ways.

UBMBT
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:30:55 (EST)
I came up with 108 Williams St (401)849-4747 and mapquested the rest.
generally keep my island presence down to once a decade
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:09:22 (EST)
ill be there from 7-11.. its a friends b-day paahty. he 30. never been there before. i think we have the abck room to ourselves
chong
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:03:48 (EST)
Where is said Sully's? Or are you playing at George and Holly's? And yes I do like my fud overpriced, my waitstaff surly & inexperienced, and my fellow diners/drinkers attituded. What time is dinner, Chong?
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 12:02:08 (EST)
trust me, if you like your $15 meal cooked by 15 year old skaters and you like to hang out a place that's populated with hipster doofusus who hate you because you're old then sure, you'll LOVe the Slavation cafe, Chong.
Native Newporter
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 11:49:22 (EST)

lapdog circle sniff
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 11:29:44 (EST)
T-SHIRTS now on sale!


BSFCP
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 11:23:29 (EST)
Funny, i'll be in Newport tomoree night. At the salvation cafe no less.... Is it really that bad V!C?
CHONG
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 11:11:59 (EST)
Millions of NASCAR collectible plates have been shattered.
Lester
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 11:08:06 (EST)
Aurthur Miller will not be coming down for breakfast
WiFfy Loman
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:59:59 (EST)
shark cam, need I say more
check out the other ones too
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:58:31 (EST)
what time be jammy, and I thought that joint closed?
updating my cross-bridge passport
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:37:04 (EST)
Bring an extra guitar ;)
Sneak
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:12:20 (EST)
Morning all! I took my bottle or two of happy pills and I'm ready to try the "new, positive me for 2003!" Now when the fuck was that QOC's bithday party. Don't tell me it was last night. what kind of idiots have night parties in the middle of the week?
MJ®
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:09:09 (EST)
doods, we're jammin' down Sully's tomorrow night, come on down
v!c
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 10:00:59 (EST)
oops, forgot...
the all important link
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:49:44 (EST)
just sent my $10 valentine...

Fight Bush's Heartless Policies This Valentine's Day!
From the Global Gag Rule to abstinence-only education, President Bush's policies are hurting women and girls around the world. Every minute a woman dies from pregnancy or childbirth. Family planning could prevent 25% of these tragic deaths but, unfortunately, Bush's policies have forced family planning clinics to limit services, cut staff, or even close down completely.

WiF
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:48:51 (EST)
my suggestion, take two every four hours until desired effect takes place

WiF
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:39:14 (EST)
Oh yeah, Brak? So where did you attend prep, I mean, high school? And why are you and Space Ghost ironing? Complete Blurr looking forward to a most rocking eve on the 26th.
WR
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:38:19 (EST)
we had our cake and et it too
well it was the QOC's cake, but we et it anyway
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:37:20 (EST)
First of all, I want that Faces box set. And the X DVD that just came out. Complete Burr repeatedly referred to me as Danny Sizzler last night. And yeah I know the Dead Boys stuff is better. I was just pushing buttons.
KOL
USA - Friday, February 11, 2005 at 09:34:37 (EST)
Me Bush. Me no like science. Me need money. Me say science bad. Bad science. Bad for Bush money. Me hate science. Science bad.
doris
- Friday, February 11, 2005 at 08:26:36 (EST)
toivonen and bergie uber alles tonite; see you @ blake's.
doris
- Friday, February 11, 2005 at 07:31:15 (EST)
looks like the sizz fan site is becomming a blob fan site..... oh well, you give the people what they want i guess.

USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 22:45:45 (EST)
I have no clue what you are talkin about. Dump juice? No i'm talkin about Elmhust school down by the glenn manor house in lovely portsmouth RI.
BRAK-
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 22:44:29 (EST)
uh that wouldn't be the very tony Elmhurst school district by any chance, would it...?
MJ®
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 22:40:01 (EST)
You should really change your name to DUMPSTER JUICE
MJ®
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 22:33:26 (EST)
Whatever dude.. who came up with "MJ"? Your wheelchair dog? I had better sign in names in third grade.
BRAK
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 21:25:13 (EST)
Santa Clause sent me The Faces box set 'Five Guys Walk Into A Bar'. Does Providence have five bands which are worth five shades of shit?? Or am I just being to complemenary?? When will Providence come back on the musical map?????????????????????????????????????????????????
Martin Hannett
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 21:24:27 (EST)
Hey I had a real beaut of sign in name too-just like you,
MJ®
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 21:17:25 (EST)
Why don you do something instead of jus complaining on some band website?
BRAK-ish
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 21:11:59 (EST)
You people and your mus!c talk...it makes me sick. KOL, for real? I got some serious white longpig ass I need for you to kick for me in Middlblob. Some fucking real beauts. "I'm a developer! I'm an AMERICAN. You are a COMMUNIST! I must build a 7 acre car dealership in the watershed!" fuck you. C'mon. When you come down to jam we'll go out with billy clubs and do some fucking up, no?
MJ®
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 21:07:59 (EST)
Heyyyyyy buddy. Disconnected is pretty good but is is a far cry from young loud and snotty. For an album with a drunk guy with a gun on the cover it's pretty tame poppy stuff. Don't get me wrong buddy I love it, but EVIL BOY aint no ALL THIS AND MORE. the cd that came out last year is woth getting for the extras including a sitv crank call. "you got gumbo right?" funny as hell. "you got bar bee que yahhd bird?"


BRAK
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 19:35:56 (EST)
uhm yeah k, good day n' such
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 19:30:32 (EST)
it really stunk
ps
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 18:23:03 (EST)
Don sang a song about halitosis once.
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 18:17:02 (EST)
Yes, you can still make fun of the Amish. Wacko inbred fucks.
TS
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 17:27:58 (EST)
little red x-box was meant to appear somewhat like this

damn tongue mold screwed up my html
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 17:06:14 (EST)
v!c you're gonna get the definition police's panties in a bind

it's not my breathe that stinks, it's the mold on my tongue
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 17:02:51 (EST)
Sneak is itching for a fight. For real. He is able to antagonize and threaten those that threaten MJ.
Sneak
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:54:35 (EST)
define 'threatened' THEN define 'halitosis'
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:53:47 (EST)
yeah i don't have time for you losers. i'm out there busy with a real life. you know, making enemies outta developers attys and their thugs, getting threatened in and around town hall., getting followed by some old military dude with the worst breath known to longpig telling telling me over and over that i don;t understand why overdevelopment is good.
MJ®
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:49:18 (EST)
MWM, 59, Professional, leader of the free world, seeks daytime liasons with hot young studly servicemen. Likes: dressing up in military costumes, B&D, S&M, cutting taxes for the rich and destroying social programs for "the poor". You be tall, shaven, muscled, cut, and ready to "salute" your Commander-in-Chief. Wife likes to watch.
"George"
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:34:26 (EST)
check here for some funny quick clips. recommended- afghan diving, kid pissing on his dad's head, and barbie rough sex. However, football stuffed in.... well ya might want to think before clicking on that one
is that where footballs go in the off season?
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:26:27 (EST)
Excuse me while I whirl like a lathe.
Diana, Princess of Wales
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:25:13 (EST)
Just think, someday Charles and Camilla will be the King and Drag Queen of England.
ed
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:23:45 (EST)
Eric Bare looks like the next candidate for the "Do NOT look this in the eyes" block.
ed
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:21:23 (EST)
Heh, heh, hey Butt-Head, that kid's shakin' hands with a weiner! Heh-heh! Heh-heh!
Beavis
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:20:28 (EST)
Play some godamned hockey, you greedy fux!
fish
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 16:18:35 (EST)
that's not funny, Lester, let me the fVck outta here

USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 15:49:02 (EST)

Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 15:31:00 (EST)
The girl also alleged that Bare stripped her naked and made her "squat to see if anything came out." Bare told the workers he did strip her naked and make her squat because he was looking for contraband. He thought she had stolen a key and was trying to escape the kennel. Bare also said that the kennel was assembled over a drain in case the girl had to urinate.

USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 15:13:37 (EST)
just realized Guckert's profile pic gives a whole new meaning to bush's presidential ManDate
.
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:59:03 (EST)
I have this ugly image in my head of an enema bar- bartenders filling enema bags hanging on poles the whole length of the bar, the bags filled with cosmopolitans, frothing beer, frozen mudslides, slices of of lime on the rims, or even umbrellas. "Hey Mabel, how about another Colonic Label?"
definite idea for the suggestion box at the Defecatur
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:54:06 (EST)
FOLLOW UP -- "That's the way he went out, and I'm sure that's the way he wanted to go out because he loved his enemas"
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:35:58 (EST)
suddenly I find my mouse rather.... stimulating
vigorously working the scroll wheel back and forth
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:30:53 (EST)
the more I look into this one the better it gets. Here's bush's boytoy profile pic


...and bush hugging his "pal"

"PS Why did Talon News, Gannon's former employer, just remove a SLEW of articles from their archives? Gannon's stories, and other stories on gay issues that weren't even by him, are now all gone? Were those OTHER bylines HIS as well?"

not that there's anything wrong with that
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:28:16 (EST)
And a triple! Best subliminal advertising EVAH!
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:17:04 (EST)
How touching! The Queen is overwhelmed with emotion! THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT HAS BEEN ISSUED ON BEHALF OF THE QUEEN The Duke of Edinburgh and I are very happy that The Prince of Wales and Mrs Parker Bowles are to marry. We have given them our warmest good wishes for their future together.
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:12:33 (EST)
Another in the "let's lock the teenager up" stories--I know, in the dog kennel this time.
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:09:43 (EST)
awesome Post headline- Bush press pal quits over gay prostie link

as long as they don't get married
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:04:58 (EST)
"Among the domain names registered by Gannon's company several years ago, but never launched, were Hotmilitarystud.com, Militaryescorts.com and Militaryescortsm4m.com..."
guckert- founding member of Pornbots For Bush
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 14:02:00 (EST)
So how is it that a journalist who only set up shop in March 2003 and received WH press credentials on April 3, 2003 and posts regularly on the FreeRepublic.com bulletin boards, was "in the loop" enough to have knowledge of a classified CIA memo by October 2003, that supposedly only "inside-the-beltway types" knew about and no one at the CIA would confirm? There is only one conclusion. He was planted by, and used to help, the administration....

...Jeff Gannon was planted by the administration to disseminate their talking points unfettered by any journalism ethics or investigation shortly after the Iraq war, when the failure to find WMDs was becoming apparent. He became incredibly useful in L'Affaire Plame to continue to push the dual stories that a) Plame's name was already common knowledge and therefore `outing' her was not a crime and b) to continue to help discredit the CIA and Wilson. Based on the evidence, I believe the 2002 CIA memo was leaked to Gannon when Novak became unusable and when the `mainstream' reporters with CIA contacts were not pushing the WH's preferred story line. They needed cover, and they got it.

I know it's a long post but nobody is gonna read it anyway
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 13:58:30 (EST)
In the interesting case of the paid GOP blogger in the smear campaign against Daschle, Gannon was the chief "news source" cited, creating the surreal case (as one commenter noted) of a fake blog citing a fake reporter from a fake news agency.
is lester the commenter (sic) noted?
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 13:55:08 (EST)
"Crowds at BlöödHag shows can expect to be pelted with classic Sci-Fi novels while their hearing is destroyed by the balls-out attack that is uniquely Edu-Core. BlöödHag tears up the stage in a freaked-out frenzy of activity, pausing only to elaborate on the personal histories and great works of the authors the songs are about. In around twenty minutes the show is over, and class is dismissed. The crowd mills about, reading the books they were just hit in the head with, and feeling a whole lot smarter." Where's the BS recommended reading list?
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 13:31:25 (EST)
Amish Porn makes me want to "raise the barn" if you know what I mean!
ed
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 13:31:09 (EST)
Isn't Talon News the name of the Smallville high school newspaper?
ed
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 13:29:27 (EST)
Heard a piece on Guckert on NPR testerday, the fvk wouldn't even admit that Guckert was his real name. The guy used to run porno websites too.
so much for liberal media bias
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:54:27 (EST)
Fake journalist with fake name from fake news service gets to question fake President.
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:44:37 (EST)
Sometimes the jokes just write themselves.
From the Mediabistro Job Listings:

"FOX News Channel, a fast-paced 24-hour television news operation in New York City, is seeking a Fact Writer for its information center"
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:31:06 (EST)


"And you will know me by the trail of phlegm..."

didn't Jebus say that in the Sermon on the Mountie?

studying up fer my theology class
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:25:31 (EST)
Check it out, the tsunami shortened the day, moved the north pole, and moved Sumatra a couple of feet.
remind me never ever to pick a fight with a tsunami
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:21:12 (EST)
And you will know me by the trail of phlegm...
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:19:51 (EST)
locked up IN the bedroom
that missing word guy
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:19:17 (EST)
Hey TS, does that mean we can still pick on the amish?
beards without mustaches just crack me up
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:18:36 (EST)
You mean it's wrong to keep 14 year old girls locked up the bedroom?
how's a fella supposed to have fun anymore?
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:16:13 (EST)
Happy birthday to QOC. Too bad I can't make it to the party. And I suggest everyone shuts the fuck up about Jews and Catholics and Palestinains. Why can't we just get along together, eh?
TS
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:15:53 (EST)
Worse than cat juggling. . .
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:14:46 (EST)
In case you needed yet another reason to root for the mighty Brewers - they just signed Corey Hart.
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:06:21 (EST)
very heartening story here
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 12:05:32 (EST)
How about an invitation to ALL lurkers: QOC's birthday today. Pahtee at the Defecateur to include cake and drunkenness. Stop by and say hello.
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:36:46 (EST)
Orgasmically she pressed the button, sending waves of ecstatic pleasure through every inch of her body; she pressed it again. Maniacally, in a trance, she pushed harder and harder, whimpering, sweating, losing her breath. Volume up, volume down, channel up, channel down, contrast, color, tone. The picture box followed her every command, fulfilled her every desire she punched into the remote control. With one final thrust of the volume she shuddered, screamed and collapsed euphorically onto the plush carpeting, only to be quickly swarmed by the eager group.
amish erotica = funny
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:30:20 (EST)
foreskin slurping circumciser with herpes = mohel with a boil
now there's a rhyme you don't get to use every day
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:21:55 (EST)
While we're all making fun of people's deeply held belief systems - may I introduce you to Amish Porn?
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:20:54 (EST)
Look what George Foreman started.
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:18:46 (EST)
OK boys and girls, empty your pockets and see if you have any Wisconsin quarters. The error coins are going for a couple hundred each on ebay right now.
time to play amatuer numismatist
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:17:24 (EST)
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when a young boy runs by. The priest, with a lecherous look in his eye, turns to the rabbi. "Wanna screw him?" he asks the rabbi.

"Out of what?"
Lester
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 11:17:07 (EST)


"I think I have gone insane."
welcome to the club
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 10:40:11 (EST)
hmmm... where exactly did this sudden insertion of the word ALL come in? I mean other than in you rant?
ALL lurkers are useless longpigs
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 10:38:48 (EST)
I think I have gone insane.
KOL
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 10:38:32 (EST)
Didn't you know? ALL Israelis shoot innocent Palestinians. ALL Palestinians are peace-loving people. ALL Israelis munch on the bones of flower-baring offspring of PLO members. Israel dumps radioactive flouride in the drinking water of the west bank, while Yassir Arafat's ghost sings silly love songs. The evil j@ws are without virtue, obviously.
KOL
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 10:21:17 (EST)
Why rape little boys when you can slaughter Palestinian children wholesale?
Rabbi Dumbkoff
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 10:00:13 (EST)
well, let's not forget that circumcision dude that removed the blood from the penile wound with his mouth; oh! and in so doing gave one of the boys a fatal case of herpes
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:52:51 (EST)
Plenty, but they're not free!
WR
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:44:09 (EST)
"I think I need some serious counseling," 24-year-old Sarah Kenney told The Daily Sentinel newspaper on Wednesday editions. "This is the most serious lie I've ever told, but I've been caught in many lies."
v.
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:41:07 (EST)
yes
me
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:36:56 (EST)
can we agree on anti-religion?
v!c
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:33:09 (EST)
Uh Boris, see, simply changing your anti-catholic rant to an anti-semitic rant just doesn't work. There's just not a big history of rabbi's raping kids, see?
Uh boris,
USA - Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 09:31:51 (EST)
http://prodigi.bl.uk/treasures/shakespeare/record.asp
doris
- Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 07:35:32 (EST)
or homosexual members of any sort of order. 13.5 years to be exact. wanna have some real fun? change your anti-catholic rant to an anti-semitic rant and see what happens. i wonder why that is. i really do.
doris
- Thursday, February 10, 2005 at 07:34:40 (EST)
Ummm....any photos of WR in a catholic schoolgirl uniform?
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 22:42:41 (EST)
Looking back on my own catholic school upbringing I can now figure out which of the nuns were repressed lesbians hiding out in the convent because there was no place for them in society in the 1960s.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 22:41:27 (EST)
Uhhh...I have to say that I have had the full catlick upbringing. And there was no raping by priests, nun-knuckle rapping, bb guns, or bad coaching experiences.
WR
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 20:27:01 (EST)
I prefer his bad Photoshop over his bad MS Paint
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 18:32:13 (EST)
Blob Hammock is he hottest thing since BAD PHOTOSHOP outta Detroit!
Management
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 18:16:25 (EST)
bad photoshop RULES

USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 17:59:31 (EST)
Who the fuck did that Gerry Jones photoshop montage!?!?!? I DEMAND TO KNOW!!!
TS
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 17:27:57 (EST)
I'm in a band again? Fuck.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 16:51:24 (EST)
it's easy. my new band BLOB HAMMOCK only jams once a month.
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 16:43:41 (EST)
Wow v!c, how do you cope with being in three bands at once?
CHONG
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 16:30:05 (EST)
DON'T be a FUCKING BREEDER
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 16:14:43 (EST)
You forgot something else...
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:47:31 (EST)
if it were anatomically possible I would be shtooping myself instead of answering you, but all those things were part and parcel of all the cathlick kids' experiences in my neighborhood (oh, I forgot playing hockey). If that bothers you...
well you know
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:46:00 (EST)
you forgot one thing...
KOL
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:33:56 (EST)
I thought all those things WERE part of a cathlick upbringing, only thing you left out was being raped by the priests
and having your knuckles busted by nuns
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:20:07 (EST)
If I ever have a son, he's growing up with bb guns, dirt bikes, hustler magazine, and one insanely overzealous little coaching dad.
KOL
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:10:58 (EST)
What is it about bible-thumpers that they have a pathological need to make sure their kids grow up to be as ignorant as they are?
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:07:57 (EST)
No Gert Jonnys songs available on iTunes.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:05:42 (EST)
Those grape-stompers have the fattest calves I've ever seen.
ed
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 15:04:07 (EST)
There's more talk of banning books. . .
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 14:53:52 (EST)
Lester, I ask you in the name of all that's right n' proper what the fuck kinda noise was the woman making? It sounded like an honest to goodness dying hyena.
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 14:48:36 (EST)
Everyone should watch this video right now.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 14:35:39 (EST)
darned tootin', vic. now there are two teams with the abbreviated form of "Next Year" on their lids.
doris
- Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 13:55:45 (EST)
slogan: It’s good for you and made from poo.
.
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 13:33:33 (EST)
Headline of the day.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 13:14:02 (EST)
$50,201 and this FUCKING FRENCH FRY is all yours.

USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 12:40:32 (EST)
no ONE MAN nor BEAST is HOTTER than the super group GURT JONNIES taken as a WHOLE
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 12:34:46 (EST)
That's the chick who ate chong's ring.
doff
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 12:31:58 (EST)
Brak might be on to something there

but are they hotter than Gert?
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 12:03:15 (EST)
Yippee-ki-yay, motherfuckers -- Bruce Willis set to film Die Hard 4
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 11:55:37 (EST)
And WiF was disqualified becasue there's no way in hell a pancake would last 67 seconds in front of him.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 11:54:49 (EST)
Here's Lester on his leg of the pancake run

WiF
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 11:49:34 (EST)
American Wins Trans-Atlantic Pancake Race. MJ's wallets unavailable for comment.
Lester
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 11:44:50 (EST)
chong you are so fucking dead
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:55:11 (EST)
she looks like the hot carnilval chick from joe dirt. my all time favorite movie
BRAK
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:51:32 (EST)
that's right, hairderesser
sydlexic spaller
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:44:11 (EST)
looks like the Gert Jonnys are overdue for a visit to their hairderesser
just not the same without the coiffure
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:42:46 (EST)
I'm hot for teacher. How the fvk can you describe anything this woman does to a male as rape?

currently seeking enrollment in her gym class
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:37:28 (EST)
Holy Crap!


Chong
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:27:34 (EST)
hot gym teacher bangs 13 year old lucky little bastard

USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:15:39 (EST)
punk rock girl w/ mohawk uhm...scalped; this is a real gem, highly recommended
v.
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 10:08:40 (EST)
Nice website. I'm hooked.
Dick Slammer.
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 09:57:15 (EST)
dirty, he's got a casa in Miami, it ain't no big deal
v!c
USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 09:34:46 (EST)
Boris lives!!!
Dexter
Bakefield, USA - Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 07:47:52 (EST)
petey shows up TEN days early for mets camp. why can't we get guys like....nevermind.
doris
- Wednesday, February 09, 2005 at 07:37:04 (EST)
Jesus H Christ, he does. That's pretty fvckin' scary.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 23:05:49 (EST)
No shit, really, I concur, the cowboy on the far left DOES look exactly like ed!
NO JOKE PART 2
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 21:28:47 (EST)
Actually ed, the cowboy on the far left looks JUST LIKE YOU!!!
NO JOKE
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 19:57:07 (EST)
Although in his defense, you have to figure a kid with the name "Jeffrey Swisher" spent every day of his life getting the crap kicked out of him in the schoolyard.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 19:13:05 (EST)
Whoa! I gotta get me one o' those Leningrad Cowboy suits!
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 19:08:51 (EST)
good day AND good night
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 18:55:46 (EST)
How many Bush administration officials does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.
There is nothing wrong with the light bulb; its' conditions are improving every day.
Any reports of its' lack of incandescence are a delusional spin from the liberal media.
There is no shortage of filament.
That light bulb has served honorably, and anything you say undermines the lighting effect.
Why do you hate freedom?

looks like the dim bulbs have it
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:56:54 (EST)
I'll put the lights on your choppers, Meaty.
TS
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:46:19 (EST)

need at least a sub-orbital vacation
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:31:39 (EST)
don's new threads + axe

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:23:22 (EST)
don't forget us!!
The Leningrad Cowboys
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:21:20 (EST)
Like thus?

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:16:55 (EST)
post away. those choppers should be in lights.
Meat Tooth
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:07:42 (EST)
sorry, YAWN again
v.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:06:45 (EST)
yawn...ho hum...sigh...

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:06:02 (EST)
knowledge that the law don't cover it + new easily concealed camera/video phone = candid "snap"shots
say cheese
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 17:02:59 (EST)
depends on how you define "wrong" - probaby a common practice for MORE than one lurker...
v.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:59:00 (EST)
at a glance, yes or no: did this fella do ANYTHING wrong?

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:55:54 (EST)
New existential independent film project- Being Gert Jonny
crawling inside their heads = the mind staggers at the possibilities
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:54:54 (EST)
KIRK HAMMMET!!!!!!!! MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:53:52 (EST)
I implore you. please stop. PLEASE stop. I beg of you. I've spit the last three riesen's directly onto my monitor. I beg of you to show mercy. You absolutely cannot look athe collection of images and not piss your pants just a little bit. The Gurt Jonny's have made me lose one cubic inch of urine so far.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:52:10 (EST)
project idea for next benny geeg- make life-sized cardboard cutout of the Gert Jonnys with the faces cut out and charge $5 bucks a pop to get your pic taken as the band.
two syllables- cha... ching
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:48:42 (EST)
2nd from left, short man's John Malkovich
v.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:45:56 (EST)
the benny boys with the white pants look like Guns 'n' Roses compared to those other crews
.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:45:09 (EST)
ok, one more 'cause the name just rolls off the tongue...ladies & lurkers, I give you the:

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:43:55 (EST)
Was there just one demented "hairdresser" and one demented costume "designer" in all of norway at the time or something?
.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:42:41 (EST)
the key here is the Sharpied-in name...

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:40:45 (EST)
good lord, there must be a whole cottage (cheese) industry of these "guys" out there. And I DO mean out there.

lapels say it all where words fail
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:39:05 (EST)
umm, guys.... I think we might have some competition here.

nipsy at a loss for words
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:36:31 (EST)
hard to stop laughing at that GJ
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:35:05 (EST)
early Kirk Hammett, top center?
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:33:18 (EST)
What would Marty Feldman think of the Jacko trial?
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:31:55 (EST)
effin' JACKPOT

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:30:45 (EST)
WR - what you need is a Nyquil Stinger. 2 oz Original Green Death-flavor Nyquil + 2 oz Absolut Citrus over crushed ice.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:29:45 (EST)
Hey WR, after those nyquill illusions, Dr. Kinsey really wants an interview. BTW, where's Boris? Yucky Gipe, from Bullet Lavolta ,once gave me great tour advice, wash your hands as much as possible.
Dexter
Bakefield, USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:29:33 (EST)
donny & marie singing foot-foot = scariest cover ever
headed for my cave before it really happens
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:25:47 (EST)
Superman is a Dick provides hours of fun.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:22:46 (EST)
did I miss the meeting where scalping became a punk ritual?
for sale- unused case of scalpicin
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:21:41 (EST)
Gert Jonnys look like what you'd get if the Osmonds cross-bred with the Shaggs.
ed
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:21:17 (EST)
My take on the gert jonnys gesture- "Observe my 3 cloned gerts before ye. Know that they have powers far beyond their hairstyling and tailoring skills. Know this, and live in eternal fear."
even my phone is shaking with fear
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:10:31 (EST)
Gail Greenwood, Chiznil Miznott, Terry Linehan, Mizzle Dippin' makes up tha bulkheezee explosion known as B-E-Double-Nizzy Sizzla bitch ass nigga.

Mah cousin gots wicked ecoli F-R-to-tha-izzom a Sizzla.

B-E-Double-Nizzy Sizzla's skill level dictates tizzle they own, utilize n maintain a three full-stack backline.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 16:08:52 (EST)


do you think it was the glove down his pants that gave it away?
cory feltman
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:59:54 (EST)
hey...now tht you mention it, lester kinda looks lik Corey Feldman...
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:59:45 (EST)
I think Gurt Jonny upper left corner is signifying thus: While it's okay to wear hair like Gurt Jonny upper right, it's preferable to wear hair like lower Gurt Jonny's
my two cents
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:58:45 (EST)
fvked up enough? what's that?
appreciate the effort though
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:56:30 (EST)
Feldman speaks!
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:56:12 (EST)
Blurr could pass for any of the four; question: WHAT in the wide wide world of gurt jonnies does the gurt jonny far left gesture signify?
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:55:57 (EST)
Yes Vic, it's true, you cannot and you shall not top the Gurt Jonny to the far right; but he DOES bear a slight slight resemblance to Pete Burr, no?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:52:48 (EST)
Only 53 days till real sport (euro stylee) starts
my ball are large and oblong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:52:10 (EST)
PS-my tab was only 47 bucks. I don't get it. Did I get a price break? Did everybody get fucked up enough?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:50:16 (EST)
you cannot and you shall not top the Gurt Jonny to the far right; it's not even remotely feasible
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:49:54 (EST)
bullet lavolta =a good band. meat, should i post said pic of teeth?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:22:30 (EST)
Sneak, why wait? You could try that outfit out over at MJ's shack.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:21:54 (EST)
Just before I kill myself, I am going to put on an SS officer's uniform, with the butt cut out and grow a big mustache.
Sneak
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:16:15 (EST)
re: rollover HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!! that am awesome!!!!
Chong!
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:16:06 (EST)
Those are the outfits you put on just before you kill yourself.
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:09:22 (EST)
hey, i'm trying to get a kid-punk show together for march 26th at a studio in prov. any of you kiddies wanna play? i know 4 teeny-punk bands i could get, possibly
Meat-in-Pants Productions
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:06:02 (EST)
oh...my...god. LOOK at those OUTFITS! do they come in brown and yellow? Hey Chong, if you were responsible for bringing 14 people to the geeg how come you were always standing by yourself, eyes moist with tears?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 15:03:11 (EST)
Are you a bigger Sox fan or Patriots fan?
WR
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:48:19 (EST)
So THAT'S what happened to the campbell soup kid
indicating that guy on the right
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:35:22 (EST)

You Guys Need
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:33:02 (EST)
she play "hard to get" chong get that all the time...
chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:32:28 (EST)
Yea sorry about that vic. It's all my fault. And i'm glad to see the bastards that stole MJ®'s quarter rolls found some new employ in Denver.
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:32:15 (EST)
there are so many delicious tidbits in this news item I don't know where to begin, so just read it all
v.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:17:33 (EST)
hey. I remember that voluptuous girl. first she was there. then she was gone.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:12:15 (EST)
Strange.... I DIDN'T KNOW LESTER WAS THERE!!
Chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:00:40 (EST)
I like the 'Disconnected' solo album MORE than I like the Dead Boys, I think.
KOL
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 14:00:39 (EST)
This is stretching for news. And it seems stolen from Mr. Show's *Car Wash Change Thief Action Squad*
WR
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:54:56 (EST)
My affect on the ladies is thus: Mean Joe has a hot mamma audience member staring at her as she yells along with every unknown lyric. Mean Joe gives her props for enthusiasm and her voluptuous figure. Mean Joe asks me to look, and I simply concur. The enthusiastic voluptuous figure then does an about face and promply leaves the premises.
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:51:40 (EST)
try and be MORE jealous of my haircut little miss "grease purse"
clong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:44:21 (EST)
yeah that was pretty great.... i mean what the fuck??? That chick was fucking CRYING when she saw the ring. I felt so bad for her. Then I looked in a mirror and all was right. Stiv just admitted to being a big paul revere and the raiders fan.....
Clong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:41:18 (EST)
not with THAT haircut
H.H.P.
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:39:31 (EST)
he didn't have a chance anyway
Hottie Hot Pants
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:37:27 (EST)
Listen you mook, if you tell of beer I will stop writing your jokes, designing your shirts, and all the other stuff I do (including heckle). Do you even know that I was resposible for 14 people going to that show? If you sell me out your next crowd will resemble a benny sizzler crowd. GOT IT???? I bet your TAB was huge!!!! You fucking SUCK!!!!
Chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:36:26 (EST)
you should be able to identify at least two of these characters...

USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:36:20 (EST)
Clong, how about when you ripped that ring off your finger so hard and started chasing hottie hot pants around the room yelling "I AM SOOOO HOTTT!"
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:35:51 (EST)
T'was I posted the pictures of Cooter, upside up AND upside down and his name if not type is thus: COOTER.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:33:11 (EST)
Chong you fucking bastard, I'm gonna frog you so hard you won't know what hit ya!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:27:43 (EST)
That cool MJ. she'll even be there tomoree.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:20:35 (EST)
i soo stoopid and trade durrrr....
clong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:18:45 (EST)
HEY MJ;&trade i got even more ideas. like a Bennysizzler ringtone. It just silent cause why the fuck would aNYBODY CALL YOU ANYWAY????
chonh
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:18:15 (EST)
lester, you cephalopod biomass, you. Blow me!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:18:01 (EST)
I, for one, welcome our new squid overlords.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:16:01 (EST)
I really do know how to spell. It's the typing that I have trouble with
MJ™
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:13:15 (EST)
I actuall meant 'Comma" See one day my brothe came home and said, "SOMEBODY'S PUTTING PEOLE INTO COMMAS" and we laughed for weeks. Also, same brother said he puts his phone on vibrate mode and has his own number set to auto redial.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:11:51 (EST)
Do you mean "coma"?
TS
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:06:20 (EST)
i can put my phone in my pants and make my nutz rumble.
chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:04:46 (EST)
Just got new dead boys dvd. Stiv is pouring bud down his pants. that leather must get hot!. Too funny...... Nice cover of searh and destroy too..
Chong
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 13:03:38 (EST)
And I downloaded my first ringtone, the Exorcist theme- Tubular Bells. That should make for some fun up at PC when it goes off in my Theology class.
head is currently spinning and spewing pea soup
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:58:20 (EST)
see, and I already knew about the impending blizzwad due to my fancy gizmo. I'm talking it even shows you a current radar shot with full weather service updates. And it ain't just local weather, I can tell you the weather in London and Japan too. Now what could be more useful than knowing the weather on the other side of the marble?
such a sucker for gizmos
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:55:30 (EST)
So my phone was only getting about an hours worth of charge for 3 days, so I sez to myself, "self I sez, time for a new phone. After all the other one's 3 years old now." So I getz the new gizmo and low and behold, the damn old phone is holding a charge again. Anywho, this new one gotz ALL the bells and whistles. I'm talking blingtones, camera, video-cam, games, screensavers, messaging, e-mail, weather updates, mapquest, web, and believe it or not you can pay for TV on the damn thing. CNN at yer fingatips no matter where ya go. Now you can be a couch potato even when you're NOT on the couch. Now THAT'S what I call progress.
WiF be leaving the lounge chair
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:51:39 (EST)
By the way, another fucking snowstorm be on its way.
KOL
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:51:27 (EST)
multi-colored drums?
thought it was a flashback
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:43:35 (EST)
Hey who posted that pic of my nephew's turtle, Coooter, anyway? I mean, that's fucking HIM! did you get into my house when i was in a comma or something?
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:28:07 (EST)
drums have colors?
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:27:49 (EST)
How bout that roadie Peener, anyway? I never had my cords wrapped so tight!
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:25:59 (EST)
yeah, I think I gotta get me one more drum kit, all the same freakin' color
v!c and his pied piper drum 'kit'
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:24:30 (EST)
WR, why just this morning ole Don said that Nyquil just don't knock you out like it used to. I blamed the damn FDA. They took the good shit out. So you're right. I think now all it does it put you in a state of suspended animation where you're semi-consious, but not in a deep sleep and anxiety has an open portal.
MJ®
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:23:58 (EST)
Superman is a dick.
Lester Luthor
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:21:43 (EST)
By the way...
Chong Lee + bootleg crimpshrine t-shirt = gay-@$$

UBMBT
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:21:18 (EST)
Well v!c, if that post smells of cigarettes, urinal pucks, and the new Britney Spears perfume, then I think you may be on to something
UBMBT <Curious-available@departmentstores.everywhere>
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:16:19 (EST)
I rented the damn van. Peener was eventually successful.
v!c
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 12:15:39 (EST)
So I thought Nyquil was supposed to help you sleep. Why is it that I just have anxiety dreams all night long when I take it? There is NO way I can work in an air-conditioned building in the nude.
WR
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 11:55:22 (EST)
This is what I learned: I learned that celebrity roadie Peener has difficulty urinating into recepticles whilst in a van or car, no matter how bloated his blatter may be.
doff
USA - Tuesday, February 08, 2005 at 11:48:54 (EST)
rumor has it the Wiffer "Nipsy" Russell has been conscripted into service at the Living Room g!g; this may or may not stop him from pursuing your tax return for a nominal fee