lurkive 05-20may03

Please email all complaints to: BSTC

WINNER-BEST GUITARIST in S.E. NEW ENGLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WINNER-MOST ANNOYING BAND EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Doris, thank you for the pinch.
BSTC
USA - Wednesday, May 21, 2003 at 00:42:36 (EDT)
Okay it's noon at night and I'm finally caught up reading all the logs you turds dropped. Furze®, you win the award for the most physical lurker-ever. Unless you count the time croc shaved.
BJ®
USA - Wednesday, May 21, 2003 at 00:41:22 (EDT)
Did someone on this lurk recently run 13 miles-in a row-all at once...?
BJ®
USA - Wednesday, May 21, 2003 at 00:22:43 (EDT)
oh my.
Lard Ulrich
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 21:10:39 (EDT)
when he discovered this maneuver
butthead
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:38:36 (EDT)
when did bush start parting his hair down the middle?
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:29:41 (EDT)

hail to the beef
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:28:12 (EDT)
Bonobos.
Got Perpetual Sex?
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:15:03 (EDT)
Woa, sorry. Musta been reliving that whole 1919 Black Sox scandal. Don't eat them brown Fenway Franks!
Don
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:11:43 (EDT)
Newsflash--CHIMPS DEMAND RECOUNT!!!
They refuse to accept bush into the family tree no matter what the DNA evidence.
A spokesman for the chimps said, "C'mon look at that moron, there's no way we're related to him no matter the resemblance."
A scientific committee of the chimps is demanding to examine the evidence for possible dangling nucleic acids that would prove that bush is not a chimp.

laughing hyena
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 19:09:19 (EDT)
bush may be human after all. I hear the chimps are revolting at the suggestion that they're related to the Chimp-in-Chief.
sum chimp
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 18:42:53 (EDT)
don, don, don. last one i'd expect to be a blast femur.
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 17:51:43 (EDT)
Are the sox pitchers or catchers?
Don
Brown Balled, USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 17:25:57 (EDT)
boris that sounds a bit thin after the pitching start the sox had last night.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 17:19:53 (EDT)
best to save pedro for the good teams anyhoo...
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:43:18 (EDT)
this suddenly seems bizarrely appropriate after the man/moo debate and the mad cow disease story

croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:31:13 (EDT)
I missed two each on the he/she and the wizz/jizz quiz. I guess all those years of looking at porn finally paid off.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:28:51 (EDT)
Lester ain't gonna be happy about this, but no go on the Pedro tonight.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:25:30 (EDT)
I missed two on the quiz too.
Furze®
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:19:50 (EDT)
12/16 shemales. 13/16 milky.
Drugsy
define gay, USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:17:16 (EDT)
I missed two on the female/shemale quiz, how'd you do there willykins? Is your manly pride intact? I got another from the same source, this one is... get this, man-milk or moo-milk?!
my man-milk ain't past-yer-eyes
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:05:33 (EDT)
he-she quiz funny...just hope you never live that real-time...Doris...Loster...FF THE KID...oh, and esp you Cric
WLiiard
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 16:00:27 (EDT)
hit him with some mad cowplex and follow up with a sarsplex.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 15:38:35 (EDT)
make sure it's the suplex and not the simplex, which he already has courtesy randy andy pettitte...
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 15:32:45 (EDT)
Alright you motherbitches, I'm out of here. Heading up to the friendly confines of Fenway Park to see Pedro no-hit the Yankees. If during tonight's game you see someone jump onto the field and give Jeter a suplex, that'd be me.
Lester
Arcata, CA USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 15:17:26 (EDT)
OK, quiz #2
female or shemale
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 15:10:00 (EDT)
Yo BJ, you been staring at the swirly trip thing too much? The tampoff brown & yellow tee pics are still there. Maybe you should take a few sips from the juice box and lay down for a while.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:44:41 (EDT)
For Doris, Croc and Willy, well you guys get to sniff my bra.
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:30:53 (EDT)
Lobster, for you I'll even remove the wig!
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:26:17 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:23:03 (EDT)
One last jewel before I leave you all for the meat again. I didn't even get to go on the WBRU field trip like you guys did. I'll make it up to you all I promise! i'll take my teeth out and everything! hey did anyone else notice that all the 9and there were MANY) pictures of Joe Tampoff wearing the brown and yellow were removed from the Noise board? So fucking funny.
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:19:34 (EDT)
yeah except ten minutes after you eat the tainted beef your name becomes Spongiform Squarepants.
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:18:15 (EDT)
Huh? How'd the Lobster do this?

USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:17:33 (EDT)
That's ME!
Spongiform Encephalopathy
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:16:21 (EDT)
veggie by choice? maybe not
boris
- Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:15:25 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:14:28 (EDT)
you'll never find no fleas on me
Blong
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 14:04:20 (EDT)
this makes more sense than the rest of my day

free toe bandy toe
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 13:53:39 (EDT)
Another lurker's identity revealed.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 13:42:45 (EDT)
overheard at the Willy residence: "get the hell out or i'm callin' the cops!"
Willard
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 13:23:22 (EDT)
overheard recently at the Chong residence-
--a discussion of wildlife
--a simple trade offer
--an explanation of cooking techniques

croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 12:37:17 (EDT)
Wurd to your Corinthian satin tour jacket
Drugsy
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:54:17 (EDT)
Alright, quiz time. So you think you can tell males from females? Well, what about he-nails from she-nails?
cuticle croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:41:36 (EDT)
Word to your mother, Frilly.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:40:20 (EDT)
word to this lurk above all others
willy
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:27:58 (EDT)
A metaphor for human existence was spotted in the 1800 block of Q Street, but police couldn't find the enfeebled, near-moribund personage seen crawling in the roadway, attempting unsuccessfully to rise.
jesus h christ
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:27:50 (EDT)
"In shadows behind Tavern Row Some torpid toke-takers gave blow To nugget-packed pipes Cops met alleysnipes And squelched a bowl’s magical glow."
Damn Hippies
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:08:08 (EDT)
The police log updates every Wednesday. I read it religiously. Click this link to check for updates or read previous articles.
Lester
Arcata, CA USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 11:06:19 (EDT)
In 14th Street someone caught sight
Of a rockpile achieving some height
The rock-ous road draping
Was traced to landscaping
Relocated there in the night.

best laugh
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:56:35 (EDT)
But Martinez calls the groundswell of resolutions "merely symbolic. We haven't had an instance where localities are not complying."

this guy obviously hasn't read my file yet.

croc says- the wrong side of the law is the right side
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:54:39 (EDT)
Plus Arcata has the greatest police reporter in the world.
Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:46:41 (EDT)
Croc, that's why I'm moving to Arcata.
Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:45:19 (EDT)
Juice box? No more juice boxes.
Fresh squeezed lemonade.
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:44:10 (EDT)
Damn you Lobster. Damn you to H-E-double hockey sticks
kicked to the curb repeatedly
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:41:49 (EDT)
Don't worry bout it Lobster we got bigger fish to fry. Check the latest on progress in the big brother project.
croc says- time for revolution
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:37:44 (EDT)
By the way croc, you HAVE to try this optical illusion!
Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:37:26 (EDT)
Sorry croc. Your post wasn't there when I clicked "add". Honest.
Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:35:06 (EDT)
Field trips. No more field trips.
Juice Box
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:27:43 (EDT)
sure, post a couple of minutes after me and call it "deserted".
kicked to the curb
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:23:21 (EDT)
HOLY FUCK, did you all miss a real man round this place or what? Fuck. I got a log jam of posts ahead of me to catch up on. Give me an hour. I'll get back.
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 10:08:02 (EDT)

Lurk appears to be deserted
Fox Point, RI USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 09:58:26 (EDT)
Well I didn't slam it, but I p!ssed on the fire hydrant to mark my turf.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 09:56:06 (EDT)
Here's a thread just begging to be slammed. . .
Lobster
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 09:16:19 (EDT)

Kinky
USA - Tuesday, May 20, 2003 at 07:33:57 (EDT)
Cup schmup. When ManUre wins we all lose. Kanu say put me in or trade me? Pires is a class act though, even with the Jackie Stallone headband.
Donure
24 Hour Party Killers, USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 22:21:28 (EDT)
I'm out{{{{{}}}}}~~~~~~~~~~
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 18:52:14 (EDT)
now she's gone again, that satan is a fickle bastard.
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 18:48:09 (EDT)
Hey! satan made the dancing chick w**K!? curiouser and curiouser...
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 18:47:33 (EDT)
alrighty then. Guess I gotta get satanic on the dance tip

croc got 999 painted on his hemorhoid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 18:45:32 (EDT)
been to long without sum dancing on the lurk

two-step croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 18:41:00 (EDT)
I guess Furze was right, the mere suggestion of me having limits stopped the lurk dead in its tracks.
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 17:31:04 (EDT)
Looks like Scotty boy is up to his old tricks
way off weiland
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 16:21:58 (EDT)
I take that means you don't like the haircut ma'am?

sum clip joint
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 16:13:33 (EDT)
See that Furze, and you didn't think I was a man of principle.
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:55:33 (EDT)
I think he mentioned it when i caught him in a highly inebriated state at Nick-A-Nees a couple of months ago. Did you know I DJed his wedding reception at Yawgoo Bakes? Still the best wedding I've ever DJed. The marriage is already over, but damn what a great party. I've wanted to do a party there again ever since. Maybe we should w**k on a Benny Sizzler/DJ Grizzly clamebake combo.
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:53:19 (EDT)
and I will kill all of ya's dead
Yup
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:49:33 (EDT)
HOLY SHIT! WE FINALLY FOUND OUT PROCTOR'S LIMIT!!! STOP THE PRESSES!!!!!
Furze®
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:49:31 (EDT)
fuckin meat SUCKS but bye-bye bucket anyway so who cares. congrats on yr silver there don ho. and on watching semen tend for city next year. hey what the fuck they both topped spurs. croc did u know crowley (mama's) bought fiddler's green in scenic warwick?
doris
- Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:35:53 (EDT)
So that must be the last pic of the INXS dude before he choked that thing.
Don
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:22:52 (EDT)
Check the flick samples here for a good scare.
When I used to bartend down at Mama's Metro there was a pack of J & W sorority girls that were into the strangulation trip big time. They'd actually dump guys that wouldn't pander to there strangulation fetish. I'm not one big on limits, but chancing a murder rap to get some chick to the next level just ain't happenin with me.

croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:15:46 (EDT)
yup, minus the hyphen that is.
all choked up
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 15:02:51 (EDT)
I think it's called something like auto-erotic asphyxia. I'll google to confirm
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:56:50 (EDT)
blah blah blah- does that mean you're the one who found the dog poo?
poo poo poo
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:45:54 (EDT)
What do you call that croc? You would know.
Don
????ixation?, USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:44:26 (EDT)
Is that not Newport rocker Dylan Roy holding his cock on the right, next to Mr. INXS? Say didn't Mr. INXS die from holding his cock and his breath too long in some sort of "accident"
Don
RI Red Faced, USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:42:19 (EDT)
blah blah blah Middleblob
Willy
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:28:03 (EDT)
I dunno, Lester. Some of us WORK at work, though.
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:27:39 (EDT)
would you believe...

Die Screaming With Sharp Things In Your Head
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:16:41 (EDT)
everyone's off at the COCK fights
the ghost of that INXS guy
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 14:06:31 (EDT)
Shit, I post a picture of Michael Jackson wearing a Pete Burr wig and the lurk up and dies. Where the hell his everyone?
Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 13:45:33 (EDT)
It was discovered early Monday afternoon who had been behind a recent series of pranks in Middleblob
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 13:44:05 (EDT)
That was a sweet story, Lester. Ashcroft should do us all a favor and cease to breathe.
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 13:44:01 (EDT)
Why do I even bother to read the news at all? It just makes me all pissed off.
Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 13:22:08 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 13:15:07 (EDT)
isn't that brownfield pastures?
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:25:52 (EDT)
that bulkhead never kept me out the basement
Willard the Rat
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:24:07 (EDT)
Middleblob: The infamous "Benny Bulkhead" has headed to browner pastures. After years of dutiful service the Bulkhead felt she could no longer perform her duties of keeping rodents, vermin, and cops at bay. "They just take their toll on your ability to serve," she told reporters. "My heart tells me it's time to go." She told Benny last Friday of her decision in an emotional meeting at the end of which Benny kissed her on her bald head.
Bulkhead Retires
Middleblob, USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:11:25 (EDT)
Chong had other digit once but chong not want to talk about it. Very dishonerable.
Chong
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:04:27 (EDT)
Chong, that's your first significant digit ain't it? Begrudged congrats
croc say chong got mad kung fu skills
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:02:41 (EDT)
LURK #50005-- Well at least it has a nice ring to it.
croc missed the big one
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:00:41 (EDT)
Oh sorry. My bad. I was caught up in trying to learn slang from my new youth pastor pal.
Furze®
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 12:00:03 (EDT)
#50,000 Chong Lee is most honor thanking you.
Chong
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:59:49 (EDT)
OK, who the fuck got it? Who kept pressing refresh till it hit. That's cheating. An empty victory.
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:59:27 (EDT)
damn missed the 50K. See y'all at 100K
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:59:26 (EDT)
OK, if you're still riding the Jeff Foxworthy craze, you have bigger problems than the shirt you wear to school to deal with.
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:58:11 (EDT)
nobody ever reads my posts (sigh). kiss on the head etc....
croc already hit the ari story
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:57:26 (EDT)
NOT Lilith
Willith
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:56:14 (EDT)
Added this avatar to the analbloodfart tag

croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:55:09 (EDT)
Holy SHIT! Is it possible to find a shadier character to fill his shoes?!!?
Furze®
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:54:17 (EDT)
oh yeah lurk#49963!!!! i rule! that numba is more important in my country!
chong
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:51:10 (EDT)
Yeah she got onion, but do she got edith?
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:26:17 (EDT)
So what's the prize if you get the 50,000th lurk?
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 11:25:28 (EDT)
yo Froc, the elusive 50k lurk lies just beyond yon bunker...
Frill
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:59:17 (EDT)
my onions are just fine thank you...
Frilly
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:54:20 (EDT)
Word on the street is that Frilly ain't got an onion to speak of. Check out this shizznit. It's no diggity M&M, I give it mad props. Check out the onion on that betty, MJ®
Furze®
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:43:47 (EDT)
Ari has flown the booby-coop

--He notified Bush of his decision Friday. The president ended the conversation "by kissing me on the head," the spokesman said.--

croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:42:33 (EDT)
Walter Lure? I thought he died shooting kitty litter back in the early 80's.
Drugsy
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:17:36 (EDT)
Got your back, croc.
haha
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:09:38 (EDT)
heehee
hee hee
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:07:00 (EDT)
Walter Lure RULES.
One who knows
02840, USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:02:57 (EDT)
Screw Pocket Rot!
Got Poi?

Something's Rotten In Hanalei
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 10:00:28 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:52:31 (EDT)
http://www.geocities.com/sevenyearhawk/images/trot-nixonposter.txt
Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:52:06 (EDT)
one word then yet another deliciously doris-free day:

NOMAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

doris
- Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:49:11 (EDT)
It was also very generous of the Yankees to lose 5 out of six at home and let the Red Sox share the divisional lead.
Lobster
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:44:45 (EDT)
Hawaii is running low on poi.
Lobster
Fox Point , RI USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:23:22 (EDT)
In other news, I thought it was VERY generous of Trot Nixon to give that kid the outfield fly he caught.
croc
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:15:46 (EDT)
"he was going commando."-- now THAT'S funny. I not only ran not 13 steps let alone 13 miles, but I blissfully slept away a good portion of the weekend. I have the mental marathon ahead of me of four finals in a couple of weeks, so pacing is gonna be critical to get through it, and I still have a book and a half of edumacational pablum to digest. BTW, I started a new noise thread. Would you believe another contest?

Yes, it's the "analbloodfart desperately needs a name that don't make us all puke" contest
should be interesting to see what this one inspires.

croc <congrats to the running lurker>
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 09:13:16 (EDT)

So. As you all know I ran my first half-marathon on Saturday and the only good thing I can say about it is that I finished. Slowly. The weather cooperated. It was cool and didn't rain, and it was overcast so there was no pesky sun to deal with.

My b/f and I left JC at 5:30AM to make the 8:10AM start time. We took the PATH in to 33rd Street, then transfered to take the F train to 42nd, where we transferred a third time to the 7 train, which we took to Shea Stadium out in Queens. Once there, we caught a shuttle bus (provided by Bronx Science High School, thank you very much) to the starting line. What a bitch.

There was a guy passed out on the seats across from us the entire time on the 7 train. He was a bit rotund, had what appeared to be pink vomit on his shoes and his fly was undone. We worried that he was dead until he shifted slightly, and then we realized that behind his open fly, he was going commando. Talk about traumatization - AAAHHHHH!

The first eight miles of the race was great. Our pace was good, I was enjoying the scenery, it was nice. Then all of the sudden, everything shattered. My back seized up, and with every step I took it felt as though a white hot knife was stabbing into my upper back muscles. Horrible. It became all I could do to go on, but I did. Much to my b/f's chagrin, I bitched and complained the entire rest of the race (5.1 miles), almost crying at times. It was really ugly and I'm not proud. I was frustrated, my b/f was frustrated: he thought I was going to quit, I knew that quitting wasn't an option no matter what, and so the last five miles were brutal. A true lesson in perseverance. Needless to say, I don't think my b/f will ever run a race of this distance with me again. Yet already, I'm thinking about the next one. I want to beat the ghost of my poorly run first half-marathon. I want to beat that bitch but good.

Fin.


Furze®
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 08:27:20 (EDT)
I got some injury at paintball this weekend and had to go to the hospital. I ran into mike piazza there and ask him how long he'll be out. He say that his cruise lasts three weeks and that his boyfriend drop him off at next game. then he said "I mean about three weeks." Then he strapped on his rollerblades, skated down to his new beetle, and picked up some track lighting at the home depot.
Chong
USA - Monday, May 19, 2003 at 07:19:05 (EDT)
cha-chong, think you're confusing them with joan jett and the blackheartbreakers, da
doris
- Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 16:54:04 (EDT)
Besides, Chong hate Tom Petty anyway.
Chong
USA - Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 15:24:50 (EDT)
Watch that "nips" crap pal or I'll show you who is the real dangerous one on this board. I don't care who you saw rocking, I kill your ass.
Chong
USA - Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 15:22:57 (EDT)
You know, for all the lurkers here who think they rock or like rock and roll, I didn't see any of you motherfuckers last at Ralph's to see motherfuckin WALTER LURE. Walter is the man, and if you don't know who he is...you dont know shit about rocknroll. He did all the good stuff,it was like a greatest hits revue.."All by myself" "Chinese Rocks" "Too much junkie business" "countdown love" "born to lose" "Get off the phone" "Cry baby" "7 Day Weekend" "Pirate Love" "one track mind" goddamn he looked and sounded great with his all star Asian backing band. Fucking Nips acting the parts of Johnny Jerry and Billy... IT WAS THE BEST SHOW OF MY RELATIVELY YOUNG LIFE!
Dan <dangerussdan@aol.com>
02911, RI USA - Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 14:03:13 (EDT)
The bitch told me she was scrod!
Saku
USA - Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 12:34:09 (EDT)
bruins captain joe thornton arrested for assaulting cop in brawl outside strip joint.

meanwhile on rue de st catherines, habs captain saku the scaly released after pleading no contest to committing unnatural acts with underage menhaden.

doris
- Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 10:38:37 (EDT)
Who the fuck is running 13 miles in this day and age? That's plum nuts!
BJ®
USA - Sunday, May 18, 2003 at 01:24:01 (EDT)
Furze, if you need a running partner in town of beans my cousin's fiancee runs halfs all the time. lives near fens. me? can't even count to 13 never mind run it.
doris
- Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 22:54:46 (EDT)

crutch? i don't need no steenking crutch...
USA - Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 18:50:16 (EDT)
The half-marathon was this AM. Jesus H. Christ on a crutch, what an EFFING BITCH!!!
Furze®
USA - Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 16:45:09 (EDT)

Private Hugh Jackman reporting for SERVICE
USA - Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 16:44:31 (EDT)
That dusty, worn-out old fatwa got you down? Come to al'Green's and see the latest in fatwa, mufta and jihadi gear, just in time for summer! As always -- low low prices!
Al el-Al
Some Tent, Some Desert - Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 07:24:29 (EDT)
Chong, this shit will fuck you up

USA - Saturday, May 17, 2003 at 00:16:15 (EDT)
Chung drunk at this point. Tomorroe is pain from shooting rahge wont lookk good on resune someuimes its better not to get all shitty berore firearms,
hong WEE
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 23:49:18 (EDT)
yes

USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 21:29:35 (EDT)
Alrighty folks I'm out((((()))))~~~~~~~~~~~
croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:23:33 (EDT)
check out the wormtown threads
sum fish bait
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:08:56 (EDT)
And nobody's favorite Dick...

third strike?
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:04:57 (EDT)
Oops, sorry, hair trigger finger.
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:04:55 (EDT)
And nobody's favorite Dick...

croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:03:28 (EDT)
Tick bite is healing. Half-marathon is tomorrow! Let's all hold hands and pray now.
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:03:10 (EDT)
Tick bite is healing. Half-marathon is tomorrow! Let's all hold hands and pray now.
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:03:09 (EDT)

Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:01:54 (EDT)
On the dumbya tip...

croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 17:00:48 (EDT)

Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 16:43:02 (EDT)
Disney has been living in the magic kingdom a bit too long, methinks. If you can copy the DVD in those two days, they might as well just sell the regular DVD for the same price.
tinker's balls on an oak table
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 16:33:27 (EDT)
"his name makes me uncomfortable and makes me think uncomfortable thoughts"
lilacs on an oak table
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 16:07:28 (EDT)
You guys are FUNNY! Hey Furze®, How you tick bite?
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 14:30:12 (EDT)
Chong Lee ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Re: Anal Blood Fart Revealed! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ I think Telstar 2 is the most gross name ever. Look at me I'm a sattelite. I'm so great. I beam Will & Grace down to millions of happy customer. That guy sucks. He need to learn about telstar 3 9upper. that has Red Dwarf re-runs, pink lady and jeff, and chong lee porking channel
Another Chong jewel
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 14:18:40 (EDT)
oh my god

USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 14:04:23 (EDT)
Heh. The more I read them, the more I like them. The Death to Extremist cartoons, that is. They fucking rock. So absurdly phenomenal. Hee hee!
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 13:56:55 (EDT)
I think that post turned the lurk into a Kurosawa film.
croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 13:52:12 (EDT)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 13:07:34 (EDT)
I dunno, seems sort of like a bad idea to me. The diagram looks like sperm and ova.
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 13:00:15 (EDT)
A scientist proposes sending a grapefruit-size communication device into the heart of the Earth by blasting a crack in the surface and pouring in a huge quantity of molten iron.
hey! let's pour $10 billion of molten iron into our planet and split it open!
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 12:47:45 (EDT)
Be afraid. Be very afraid..
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 12:32:31 (EDT)
Elsewhere, visitors must dress like the fairytale Pinocchio, complete with mask and long nose, to watch a video of a Pinocchio figure sexually abusing a Pinocchio doll
i think i have an art-on
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 11:23:47 (EDT)
isn't there an 800 number for us cheap fvcks?
croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 11:12:16 (EDT)

i have a really hot ass
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 11:07:57 (EDT)
Croc, what, no mention of the posting of "1-900-ass-read" to get your anus flaming?
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:16:21 (EDT)
Re: Ball. I got your 4th right here (and then I point to my crotch)
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:15:28 (EDT)
Actually, Pete told me he was planning on wearing that same outfit to the game.
The Kid
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:14:41 (EDT)
Mornin' lurkers.. Sad re: June Carter Cash. I had the pleasure of meeting Mrs. Cash once. In the bathroom of Ocean Way studios on Sunset. I was in my stall and I heard "sweet baby Jesus I prayed to the lord that this wouldn't happen, sweet baby of Jesus..." I came out to find her struggling with a zipper on her rather trim pants on a pretty trim bodkin for a gal her age. She looked great but the zipper was stuck. She sucked in, I pulled the zipper up and she blessed me. RIP June Carter Cash. A real classy lady.
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:11:14 (EDT)
HA! I love Pete's shorts!
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:10:59 (EDT)
I just found out that Pete Burr was a hoops menace in high school. Here's a pic of him from that era. Beware the hair!
Kid
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 10:05:01 (EDT)
'Tis a sad day.
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 09:26:31 (EDT)
Why walk on water when you can walk on jesus?

sandals to save your sole
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 09:21:51 (EDT)
morning lurkers one and all. I was pleased to see the little flame jobby next to the analbloodfart thread. Thanks to maggotydickchz and chunkybrowncum. I do think the tag "hi neighbor!" is in poor taste though. please try to show SUM restraint in the future.
croc
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 09:03:26 (EDT)
Ray Collins 2, me nada
doris
- Friday, May 16, 2003 at 08:04:48 (EDT)
RIP June Carter
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 07:53:49 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 07:37:36 (EDT)
AHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHH! What the FUCK is THAT?!!?!?!?!?!?!?
Furze®
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 06:51:58 (EDT)
whut?
huh
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 06:51:49 (EDT)
Friend of mine once in a band called phinneas gage. I make him name one of the songs Marty Barrett even though it was about vegetables.
Chong
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 03:46:59 (EDT)
Before the accident he was a pleasant, dependable soul. But the rod changed things: He became unpleasant to most everyone: profane and unpredictable.
wouldn't u be cranky 2?
USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 03:01:28 (EDT)
Hey Lobster and Kid-

USA - Friday, May 16, 2003 at 00:09:38 (EDT)
What about THIS Furze®?
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 23:23:46 (EDT)
thanks. I almost puked.
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 19:54:06 (EDT)
this is too gross...
analbloodfart's cousin bloodyphlegmblob
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 19:13:12 (EDT)
What about that for a bad name, huh? BIG SIDE FACE!
Big Side Face
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 18:12:23 (EDT)
AC = Anal Cunt. Popular moniker for hipster dufus punk rockers
Cumberland AC
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 17:32:29 (EDT)
Just a couple more posts to flaming glory, but I'll have to wait till the morrow to see the flame. I'm out[[[]]]~~~
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 17:26:50 (EDT)
Well MJ can post her grievances on MY thread. so are ya all gonna hit that thread with some choice gross names so I can get one of them flamy things next to the thread or am I going to have to post another 7 or 8 posts myself?
croc batting his browneye coquettishly and trying not to analbloodfart at the same time
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 17:05:14 (EDT)
Beat ya to the spallcheck punch Furze. and I even already posted again on the analbloodfart thread.
croc got thread
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:59:33 (EDT)
MJ gonna be PISSED that someone else on the noise board is hated more than he is!
Shit Starter
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:59:08 (EDT)
spallcheck: anal BLOOD fart. der.
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:51:18 (EDT)
SPALLCHECK-analblodfart? doesn't pack quite the same punch
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:50:37 (EDT)
Yes Furze if you had never pointed out that I'm an analblodfart I would never have risen sunk to this esteemed position.
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:49:04 (EDT)
How does chunky brown jiz strike you? Is that gross?
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:46:51 (EDT)
Wait till MJ gets a load of MY thread. HAAA HAA!
croc gotz a rapidly inflating head
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:45:02 (EDT)
You got me there anal blood croc. I'm just living off the accomplishments of others while you, you have made a shrine all for yourself.
Don
Dongotnolife, USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:44:07 (EDT)
I am glad that my power can be used for grossing people out. You're welcome, you anal blood fart.
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:42:30 (EDT)
I CAN TOP THAT!!!!!!!!
Check the thread somene started about ME!!! I'm crying, laughing, anfd pissing and shitting my pants all at once. I FVCKIN RULE!!!!

croc thanks Furze for the inspiration
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:33:39 (EDT)
Ooooh Fossum pitched 4 2/3rds good innings.Wooo wooo
Ray C. <from@grave.com>
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:16:01 (EDT)
Yeah! Top those stats young fans. Winning both ends of a double header. Not to mention TWO world series rings. 1912 & 1915. Fuckin A.
Don
Nice Woolies, USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 16:11:23 (EDT)
oh, and ty cobb? pussy.
oil can boyd
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:49:24 (EDT)
Why rent-a-negro when you can call Goats-R-Us?
As with any good company, Goats R Us has a retirement program for its loyal 4 footed employees. The goats in our herd are never sold for any reason, and when their "golden years" approach, their scope of work is kept local, just outside of our ranch, where they can roam the hills without encumbering the stress of traveling between locations. All goats are supplemented year round, wormed twice a year and vaccinated, but the geriatrics are given special consideration. They are our 'buddies', and an integral part of our team, without whom we wouldn't be able to enjoy our success. Frequently, these retirees are visitors at local schools or senior centers becoming ambassadors for their kind.

croc is an old goat
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:35:07 (EDT)
The "additional services" are just wrong.
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:29:32 (EDT)
For rent?
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:28:46 (EDT)
Nope I didn't get edited, that was yesterday I got edited. And it looks like they're giving credit to someone else for breaking the board (sigh). They just edited out the qoute tag structure fvck up of mr cheese. I think he might have tried a double quote nesting or something to mess it up. Maybe I'll have to try till I figger out how he did it.

and back to ignoring MY posts.... I bet none of ya tried my trippy thing and one you posers will post the same link in a week and it'll be, oh what great post Furze, or oh what cool mindfvck lester, or what the fvck were you thinking willy, or MJ that's great but how does the swirly thing get the fur off your back, or etc...................

croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:19:03 (EDT)
1909-1915
oil can boyd
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:17:18 (EDT)
hey Don how them bongos soundin'?
Phyllis Dillard
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:10:46 (EDT)
Oh sure, when I posted that a week ago nobody commented. You're just all ignoring my posts aren't you.... AREN'T YOU!!
croc marginalized AGAIN!!
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:10:33 (EDT)
Okay, If no one else is going to say it I fucking will. Somebody gots to kill that man dead.
Killsy
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 15:04:05 (EDT)
Can you sayhell in a handbasket?
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 14:57:02 (EDT)
Excellent croc. 2 right wings is dead on. Who got edited? What'd you say? I promise not to tell the BSTC.
Don
Joho, USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 14:53:27 (EDT)
I think I broke the noise board. This takes field trip/shitstarting/lurk breaking to an entirely new level.
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 14:29:45 (EDT)
Ray somebody?
Pitchin' a guess
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 14:00:53 (EDT)
Hey, what about me?!?
Mookie Wilson
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:55:18 (EDT)
muy interesante...see I learn something new every day on this here lurk.
The Enlightened Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:52:44 (EDT)
Smead Jolley? Johnny Gooch? Guido Grilli? Sad Sam Jones? Nemo Leibold? Stuffy McInnis? Camp Skinner? Dizzy Trout? Rabbit Warstler? Squanto Wilson? Pinky Woods!!!!
oil can boyd
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:51:39 (EDT)
Take cover boys...
One last parting shot
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:51:10 (EDT)
Croc, this poem's for you.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:50:32 (EDT)
Actually the first time I heard the phrase "crappin' you negative" was in the movie Raising Arizona. It's also the name of an album by the Grifters.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:48:09 (EDT)
Crapping you negative...you can actually thank Bart Simpson for that gem. Or, if you really wanted to, you could than kthe writer of the show who came up with it.
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:43:23 (EDT)
Yo,croc! Okay I really got to go beat this meat. Anybody hear any more about Furze's tick bite? I got two tick bites once and they turned into wallets...
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:42:51 (EDT)
BJ out. BJ gotta go beat the meat. Hey, for all you Red Sox fans, did ya know ole Don's got a grandfather or some close blood relative that was some sort of famous pitcher for that team? You'll have to axe him about it. Okay lurk on valiant ones.
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:40:40 (EDT)
Ya beat me to it. crappin you negative is the gem of the week... at least
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:39:23 (EDT)
"...crapping you negative" is now my term. Okay? I thought of it, it's mine to use.
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:26:43 (EDT)
I am crappin' you negative. The dude and I were talking about punk rock and he said "A friend of mine plays bass for a punk band in Boston. They're called the Tampoffs. Have you heard of them?" So I choked back the gaffaws and said "I've heard about them, but I've never seen them." It's a small world, especially in the punk scene.
Lester
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:19:56 (EDT)
fucking funny
Check this
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:17:24 (EDT)
Lobster, you have GOT to be shitting me. Fuck me!
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:15:16 (EDT)
When I was working at the bar last night I met some dude who asked if I knew the Tampoffs. He was from Boston and knows Joe. I almost stained my yellow and browns holding back the laughter.
Lester
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:13:19 (EDT)
"DEar god please let grandfather die, he is not nice and I fear for sisters safety. Next day he is dead of suicide."
oh my god
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:12:26 (EDT)
errr...THIS jpeg

USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:08:44 (EDT)
This jpeg is a real thread killer. Every time it gets thrown in a Noise thread that either sixstringbass or ackack is in, that's the end of the thread!

USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:08:10 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:06:50 (EDT)
ohh. I get it. I didn't read the preceeding post (was it from croc? HAHA!). Oh okay. Here's what we'll do, have a CONTEST to figure out how to name the new archives
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:05:53 (EDT)
FUCK ME! nice typos and I'm tryna be all bad ass and shit. whatev. Anyways, kid, what mean you this? "Just move all of the old archives into the Noise's webspace. I'm sure they won't mind."
Spallcheck
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:03:53 (EDT)
A real man just logged on. What's up lurkers? Het frilly? You finally get laid for your birthday? HAHA not with THAT headband you didn'! HAHA!
BJ®
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 13:02:24 (EDT)
oh SH!T Lobster comes back with a roundhouse to the Kid's the willard
Mills Willard
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:55:25 (EDT)
Yeah The Kid, even Darryl thought it was a good comeback.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:44:00 (EDT)
I highly recommend that we all call Chong, "Blong".
3F Willy
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:33:23 (EDT)
Just move all of the old archives into the Noise's webspace. I'm sure they won't mind.
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:32:23 (EDT)
good comeback the Kid, with the Buckner-ism all SIGNED n' shit...
fuckin' Willard all HAMMID n' sh!t
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:31:44 (EDT)
Hey I see the archive is up to Z, what's the plan from there? Double letters? How about a different alphabet, perhaps Cyrillic for boris, or chinese characters for chong?
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 12:24:59 (EDT)
R.I.P Robert Stack
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:55:48 (EDT)
The Kid and I are actually heading up to Fenway on Tuesday to watch Pedro and the boys beat the snot out of the dreaded Yankees. If they don't, I'll immediately start to beat the snot out of the Dreaded Kid. No word yet if Roger's pitching that game.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:51:17 (EDT)
If clemens wins steinbrenner is benchim him untill the toronto home game to sell more tix. Jose contreas will pitch at fenway. WHAT A DICK!!!
Chong
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:46:04 (EDT)
blissfully doris-free board after this: if clemens beats texas he tries for #300 at fenway and gets fuckin' HAMMID. then there's #2
bore us
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:41:16 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:40:02 (EDT)
Wow. Still living in 86 huh? that's cool. How are those acid washed jeans treating you? Hate to ruin your day but soon Blair will get chubby and Tootie will be the hot one.
Chong
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:29:50 (EDT)
SPALLCHECK-bizrre? Maybe there are some side effects from that swirly thing after all. Here's that link again so youse don't gotta scroll to find it.
totally crocodelic
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:24:37 (EDT)

The Kid <The Kid>
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:22:50 (EDT)
THe Yankees may suck but at least they dont have Tony Clark on their roster.
Chong
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:21:17 (EDT)
well hot diggity dawg
my wee willard
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:17:20 (EDT)
speaking of delusional, did any of you tards try hallucinogenic swirly besides doris? I'm telling ya, it's the most bizrre thing that's ever been done to my eyes without the aid of some deadhead.
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:08:57 (EDT)

Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 11:04:58 (EDT)
Easy, Lobster...
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:51:16 (EDT)
Once the Angels complete their sweep of the Yankees and the Sox complete their sweep of Texas, the Sox will be tied for first in the American East. And then the Sox will sweep the Yanks at Fenway next week, and the Yankees season will be all but over. So take that, you Jeter-lovin' fucktard.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:47:46 (EDT)
Actually, I did win the 5th game of the 1956 World Series. Oh wait...... I think that may have been Don Larsen.
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:45:36 (EDT)
What am I in first place for? I've never won anything in my life.
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:40:52 (EDT)
hey Kid enjoy your last day alone in first place.
tommy gun
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:23:38 (EDT)
I bet you didn't even know beer came in threads. (Can I get that suit in a double-knit Sam Light?)
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:10:12 (EDT)
On the Rae Dawn Chong tip, I always wondered how such an ugly bastard had such a beautiful daughter. I figger either momma was even more beautiful than Rae or it was one of those ugly+ugly=beautiful deals (a kinda double negative thing).
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:04:01 (EDT)
started a Beer vs. God board at the noise. Stick around, this could get ugly.
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:01:15 (EDT)
Leave me outta this!
Rae Dawn Chong
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 10:00:15 (EDT)
tommy chong + tommy lee = chong lee--- so we have a guy who smokes too much dope, is under federal indictment, was in a dog-awful hair band, and has a habit of letting children drown at his pool parties.
croc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 09:55:02 (EDT)
tommy chong + tommy lee = chong lee. discuss.
tommy gun
- Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 09:46:20 (EDT)
SPALLCHECK-acroos? across-- I've definitely been misplacing my double letters lately. I wonder if it's some sort of syndrome or disease?
ccrroocc
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 09:32:52 (EDT)
morning lurkers, just came acroos a list of genius proportions.

Why Beer is Better than God... Top-5
5) They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
4) When you have a Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
3) You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second Beer.
2) You can prove you have a Beer.
1) If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.

Minister Croc Of The Church Of The Divine Beer
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 09:30:57 (EDT)
Hey, I got your cannon fodder right here! And I point to my crotch...
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 09:07:49 (EDT)
ummm....
HUH
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 07:43:39 (EDT)
That not chong's schlong.
LEE
USA - Thursday, May 15, 2003 at 07:34:40 (EDT)
This is your shlong and your other shlong normal

USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 21:04:38 (EDT)
this is my shlong on drugs
tallywhacker
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 20:02:20 (EDT)
note on swirly trip device- stare at the dot in the center when you do it. Man, I haven't tripped this hard in years!
currently having a flashback
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 16:45:49 (EDT)
willy may have a small willy, but I got a huge cock
croc-a-doodle-will-do
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 16:38:46 (EDT)
doctor worm....funny. rest of story....very not funny
bore us
- Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 16:17:19 (EDT)
You HAVE to try this!!!! I REPEAT, you HAVE to try this!! Hit the download and after it opens stare at the swirly thing keeping your hand on your mouse the whole time, count to thirty holding your breath (still staring), and then look at your hand. Happy trails to one and all. WOOHOO!
croc is currently tripping his nuts off
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:58:51 (EDT)
Hey Willy
Lobster <You too, Chong>
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:35:06 (EDT)
I bet SOMEBODY has another date with their moms tonight.
Shit Starting Lurker
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:27:43 (EDT)
I'm right here, you ol' geezer.
Lobster
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:27:19 (EDT)
where's the fresh faced kid and his side kick the lobstrocity? we need cannon fodder
blown willard
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:22:16 (EDT)
Denmark, I can live with that. Although I might have to pick a spot with cheaper hookers. And Willard, I know it may be a tad obvious to go for this joke, but why don't you get below me and y'know blow out yer candles (and points to my crotch). Many happy blow jobs to you on this anniversary
croc-chety ole fvck
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:11:22 (EDT)
Hey, if you're real lucky, Croc, Willy's might even buy you a Shirley Temple. Wheeeeee!
Furze®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 15:09:56 (EDT)
well then mr crocodile...a shot n' beer for ye at the next benny gig in a couple two three months...maybe even the elusive Doris will bore us
Bravo Delta Willard
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 14:58:28 (EDT)
Ooh! Eat me, I'm a danish!
Weird Al
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 14:53:09 (EDT)
Willy's retirement community awaits.
Furze®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 14:50:19 (EDT)
well since we have confirmation happy birthday. to you. and to david byrne, cate blanchett, bobby darin and george lucas. please note bore us did not include the new kids on the block jackass.
bore us
- Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 14:48:15 (EDT)
well Furze had the spirit but you other blobs just blew it...i'm taking my party hat else where...good day
it's me....Willard
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 14:38:30 (EDT)
PITTSBURGH (May 14) - Tommy Chong pleaded guilty in federal court to conspiring to sell drug paraphernalia.
bore us
- Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 13:48:41 (EDT)
PS. speaking of blowing down at the bus station, where's Cheffy?
BJ®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 13:13:30 (EDT)
Hey cric, I mean croc-I'm here but now I'm gone. I have to go blow some guys down at the bus station. I'll be back.
BJ®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 13:08:55 (EDT)
damn crickets!
chirp chirp
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 13:02:35 (EDT)
the retraction-retraction committee would also like to retract the spalling of "comitte" in its previous post. In all other ways the retraction of the retracted retraction is still wholly in force despite this retraction.
croc got retraction traction
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 12:13:02 (EDT)
Time to fire up the old spitfire...
Chong
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 12:00:05 (EDT)
In lieu of iLOO the retraction-retraction committe would like to retract the retraction of the retraction.

Seems someone told a LOO-LOO (or is that lieu-lieu?)..... (or is that iLOO-iLOO?)..... (or is that skip to my LOO?).... (or is that skip to my iLOO?)....

croc-to-my-iLOO my darling
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 11:48:55 (EDT)
Het everybody! I got Willy a copy of this magazine for his birthday!

USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 11:29:45 (EDT)
This has got to be a record for that lameass board
Chong's new friend
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 10:54:10 (EDT)
"I tell her she has case of fucking nuts to talk like that and that grandfather will haunt her if she keeps to be saying it."
oh my god
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 10:46:01 (EDT)
Crank up the suck nob boys.... 1, 2, 3, 4,...
hehe. good.
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 10:42:56 (EDT)
Do we have to wear silly hats?
croc
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 10:13:31 (EDT)
Quick, everyone! Let's decorate Willy's corner of the lurk with poopy brown and pee pee yellow crepe paper and balloons! Shh! Shh! He's coming!!!!
Furze®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 09:55:07 (EDT)
Nice w**k on the gutarEst thread. I hit the annoy thread to bring it to the top and to... well, annoy
croc
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 09:24:53 (EDT)
chong's EN FUEGO this week. holy crap that's funny. chong get boris 8 x 10 of ally baloney? if not, mario hilario OK too..
bore us
- Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 09:15:49 (EDT)
I work at TV news. But Check Best GUitarest thread. My sister make doughnut!
Chong
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 08:26:16 (EDT)
Help give President Bush an erection!
Lester
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 08:07:55 (EDT)
Who will save America?
Lester
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 07:46:25 (EDT)
chong what do you do, make donuts or water fairways?
bore us
- Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 07:43:11 (EDT)
A certain drummer MIGHT be having a special day today....a special, short yellow bus kind of day, perhaps?!
Furze®
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 07:13:54 (EDT)
I hate job. To early. Job has no honor. Chong USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 03:04:23 (EDT) beat ya american!
Hong Kong Chong
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 06:49:44 (EDT)
ever see a post at THIS hour you mongrels? curs! vermin! Drugsy...get the gun...
Dr. Willard
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 04:40:54 (EDT)
someone kill me and I mean now
watered down Willy
USA - Wednesday, May 14, 2003 at 01:25:07 (EDT)

spanking is also encouraged
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 20:35:12 (EDT)
well weiner boy, I guess it wood be appropriate to say-- Keep UP the good w**k! I'm out((((()))))~~~~~
sum spanker
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 20:13:42 (EDT)

national WHAT? month
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 20:05:17 (EDT)
ya really like that animation library don't ya. I checked it earlier today and forgot to come back and post this long-neck-pig

croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:59:36 (EDT)
you got the scoop on the poop dupe
loop de loop
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:54:48 (EDT)
We've been duped!!
iLOO now to be known as iPOO
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:48:00 (EDT)
I read on a yahoo profile today that May is National Masturbation Month. I'm not sure if I can pick up the pace any more, but if it's a matter of national pride I guess I'll just have to give it the old college try (talk about hackneyed expression!)
lubricated croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:45:36 (EDT)
FUCK YOU SPALLCHECK NAZI!!!!!!!
I hate you!
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:30:54 (EDT)

toady sandwich sucker
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 19:06:51 (EDT)
Toady is THIS day and (then you point to your crotch)

USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:52:06 (EDT)
May 14 is... National Dance Like A Chicken Day. May 15 is... National Chocolate Chip Day. May 19 is... Frog Jumping Jubilee Day. May 23 is... Penny Day. May 24 is... National Escargot Day. May 26 is... Grey Day. May 29 is... End Of The Middle Ages Day. May 30 is... My Bucket's Got A Hole In It Day. May 31 is... National Macaroon Day.
plan accordingly
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:50:35 (EDT)
hey, may 13 is LEPRECHAUN DAY! smoke a bowl o' clover!
paddy o'toke
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:47:47 (EDT)

damn that bigass sandwich man
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:35:14 (EDT)
Getting censored on the noise board is a first I bet. I bet they've only censored porn or bloody violent stuff in the past. I can picture the moderator turning their head like a puppy dog trying to figure what to do.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:10:11 (EDT)
Okay, I read your's too, miss. I love that they removed your ass shot form the Noise board. Kudos.
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:03:40 (EDT)
so if I tell you to get below me and blow me, you'll never know, right?
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 18:01:39 (EDT)
How do dave, what sent you packing to Vancouver? You may find some name confusion in identifying the lurkers. There's been a few additions to the family and damn near all of us have had a sort of ongoing identity crisis lately. For a tasty ass and a good laugh, scroll down to about ten this morning.
croc (formerly proctor)
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 17:59:55 (EDT)
DAVETHAFAG?!! HOLY CANADIAN HELL!!!! HOWDY HOSER!!!!
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 17:57:33 (EDT)
I only read LESTER's posts!! And definately NOT Willy's cuz he's the BILL KEANE of the LURK!
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 17:56:46 (EDT)
hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi i have been absent from the lurk for some time...... i just moved to vancouver and i havce been sans internet for a while, but now i am here and i will rock the lurk....
dave the fag
van, fucking couver - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 17:28:54 (EDT)
I'm still here, that ain't good
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 17:21:33 (EDT)
lester ain't making it up and doris posted the same story earlier. don't none of y'all read the other posts
gettin snouty bout it
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 16:33:05 (EDT)
Dr Dale Russell This animal was like a long pig with a deer-like head The study shows the dinosaur, nicknamed "Willo", to have a four-chambered heart more akin to a human or a bird than a lizard.
herb e. vore
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 16:30:01 (EDT)
eHy =HEY
Spallcheck
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 16:01:25 (EDT)
Ehy everybody, call Willy, "Wilson"

USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 16:00:37 (EDT)
A real man just logged on... FURZE®. What the FUCK?!! Ticks BLOW and I love animals. Lester, you have got to be making that shit up...
BJ®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 15:58:51 (EDT)
Mmmm...brains...
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 15:21:54 (EDT)
Texas state troopers found the missing Democrats hiding in Oklahoma. They are refusing to return. I am not making this up.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 15:13:36 (EDT)
You can never have enough brains
20K and counting
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 15:06:10 (EDT)
Ack, not any more than usual, I don't think. I'll hear in a few days about the test results and have to follow up in a month with my doc for another test. What a fucking pain in my ribs.
Furze®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 14:23:50 (EDT)
I found a pic of the lovely sammich model accepting an award for best use of a salad green.

that's a WHOLE lotta sammich
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 14:19:12 (EDT)
You're not rabid or anything, are ya?
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 14:17:23 (EDT)
So. I go camping last weekend. Having a great time. Rock and roll and all that shit. Saturday I bump (lightly) into something and I notice that my rib feels bruised so I wonder what's up. Lift up my shirt to check it out and lo and behold, I've got a little friend. A fucking tick. The peeps I'm with get it out, but it's really inflamed and nasty looking and still hurts like a bad bruise. Fast forward to Monday. I'm back in town and figure I should see my doc JUST IN CASE. I go see my doc who decides to send me to the ER. Yes, the ER. They just want to make sure there was nothing left inside the wound (puke, gag, vomit!) and so they shoot me with a local, then dig around. DIG AROUND. Nothing found. After that, they take blood to test for Lyme disease and then give me a tetnus shot. I'm on hardcore antibiotics as well. I now have a bandaid on my ribs and it looks worse than it did before I went in for "help". The ER was the most ghetto I've ever seen. I went to the hospital right by my house and I was the ONLY person/patient in the entire ER. It still took like two hours. The guy who drew my blood didn't glove up (I think he's a nurse) and was a bit of a dick - terrible bedside manner. The other doctor and nurse were okay, but it was still disturbing. So, yeah.
Furze®
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 14:09:28 (EDT)
Site down for security purposes. Resume your lurking, little brother.
Bush Anti Lurk Department
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 13:54:41 (EDT)
was it just me or was the site down?
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 13:46:26 (EDT)
My suggestion
HEEHEE
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:38:54 (EDT)
Please feel free to add your meat or condiment to the sammich
welcome to the croc deli
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:30:06 (EDT)
  Question for men.... but lunchmeat is welcome...
funny
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:22:44 (EDT)
DAMN!!! I outdid myself that thread is gonna be flaming in a matter of minutes
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:21:04 (EDT)
Well willard you'll be happy and I dare say amused to see where I sprayed on the noise board. Doris, hope ya don't mind but I scooped yer sammich.
croc got somuchsammich
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:19:05 (EDT)
this log reaks of CROCodile and BOREus...BJ, bring a hydrogenated DOUCHE post haste and a can o' Lester-Be-Gone...
Willard
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:16:53 (EDT)
Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat
J-Dogg
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 12:14:31 (EDT)
I don't think the Mexicans would be suckers enough to take texass off our hands.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 11:46:02 (EDT)
git back here you pesky donkey fuckers,dewt,dewt
BOSS HOGG
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 11:36:15 (EDT)
funny ha ha but this one's funny pathetic. texas rangers chasing democrats. are you fuckin kidding me. i vote to trade texas to mexico for a warm sixpack of Tecate.
bore us
- Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 11:11:42 (EDT)
Doris, you'll love this one. Seems the boys in the Senate F'ed up in a major way. So much for shrub's tornado tour to whip up support.
croc- seeks intern with sandwich fetish
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 10:56:15 (EDT)
you can warm my bunz anytime mean joe
Bunzy
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 10:54:43 (EDT)
No not veggie, that's zero calorie fish taco with the w**ks. I believe the meat curtain wrap goes on sale next week. I hear it drapes very nicely too.
croc loves warm buns
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 10:50:12 (EDT)
new Subway special:

bore us
Sandwich, MA USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 10:42:06 (EDT)
J-Dogg is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. I laugh out loud when he put on wizard hat.
Chong
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 09:59:03 (EDT)
Looks like it's time for Colon Bowell's brother to pay off Clear Channel and the other media whores for only showing the American sheeple the "approved" version of the Debacle In The Desert.
aren't conspiracies swell?
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 09:37:50 (EDT)
Was I the only one that used to imitate the marching soldiers in the Wizard Of Oz? Instead of YO-EE-O YO-O we say O-REE-O YO-O. Better start stocking up if'n you eat the middles first.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 09:24:38 (EDT)
Chong will dig on this inscrutable bit of hottie kung fu action.
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 09:18:26 (EDT)
J-Dogg is a frikkin genius. I'm gonna have do a chat room field trip and try to pull that one off (if you'll excuse the expression)
croc
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 09:00:00 (EDT)
Cybersex gone horribly wrong.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 08:43:19 (EDT)
More good news.
Lester
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 08:15:30 (EDT)
Oh yeah? Who?
Chong
USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 07:59:06 (EDT)
reckon i found just the man to clean up this here town i reckon.

bore ass
- Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 07:47:29 (EDT)
okay

USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 00:08:43 (EDT)
We'll kill you

USA - Tuesday, May 13, 2003 at 00:07:10 (EDT)
somebody kill Killard now...da...Doris, get gun...
Killard
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 22:20:49 (EDT)
I'm allright

USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 21:21:08 (EDT)

that ain't cool, man, it just ain't cool
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 19:34:55 (EDT)

just catchin' some rays
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 19:32:11 (EDT)
At Fort Dix's low-security prison, adjacent to the Army base, inmates are served food some find so bad that they prefer microwaved groundhogs captured in the prison yard.
poor buddy!
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:53:58 (EDT)

if you were an apple tree+you were hungry, would you eat yourself?
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:43:05 (EDT)
typical guy, your aim is off. But the baby does seem to be enjoying it. Lurk on valiant ones, I'm out{{{}}}~~~~~
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:36:15 (EDT)

i just had to try this...
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:29:22 (EDT)
Pointing to Bush's crotch
Digits
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:29:09 (EDT)

talk about a bush league pilot
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:26:45 (EDT)
more of what nobody will admit to.
con spare a sea
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 18:18:51 (EDT)
there too busy using Biz on their Staind skivvies so they'll be ready to rock without fear of the ambulance guys seeing dirty underwear.
croc remembering what momma said
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:51:11 (EDT)
croc, over on the Staind board the moderators keep making a point of telling all the posters that "none of the band members ever come to this website, etc etc...they don't like the internet, etc. etc..." I ask you this, what the fuck ELSE do loser band membes have to do all day but sign on with their laptops and hotel lobby computers and fucking google their fucking NAMES?! Fuck it's do funny..."Never come here my ASS"
The Fizzla
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:37:15 (EDT)
FYI- beware the fizzer... there's gotta be a Benny Fizzer joke in there sumwhere.
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:29:04 (EDT)
Talk about humorless idiots, did they ever stop to think of WHY they picked the name.
wearing my staind skivvies proudly
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:25:37 (EDT)
Well they're gone hate my noise board troll that said this...
you and your humunculis buddies need to get hip like the Tampoffs and Jason Kendall.

(they might not be too fond of my response either

croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:23:49 (EDT)
Someone on the the STAIND board told Mean Joe he was an idiot and everybody hated him after he said 'I Staind my shorts"
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:17:46 (EDT)
I thought you'd like that one
staindcrocsack
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:12:44 (EDT)
STAINDBALLSACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:10:32 (EDT)
There you are you little shitstarter, croc. You are so fucking funny. The bestest blogger is so before it's time I can't even tell you. Did you get told to fuck off yet like Blanket has on so many occasions? Hey -have you seen the gringo around?
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 17:06:32 (EDT)
You need a 'stache for personal reasons? What was that Steppenpoof song.... why don't you come with me little girl on a magic mustache ride
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:56:22 (EDT)
Hey Willy, where's that picture of Lester in the 'stache?
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:45:39 (EDT)
fu-UcK me!
Fartz
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:41:07 (EDT)
FUCK ME!
And again
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:30:38 (EDT)
When is it NOT funny?
Check this out
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:23:34 (EDT)
Here I am

USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:17:15 (EDT)
...and of course it goes without saying that you'll never reach my level of defecation.

USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:16:24 (EDT)
do I see the crickets gathering?
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 16:14:19 (EDT)
You gotta love that good ol' reptilian wit!
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 15:18:11 (EDT)
choise? oh bother.....
orcc rocc corc... oh bother
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 15:02:13 (EDT)
I leave it to the lurkers to check my response to this choise snap
"Mr. Analbloodfart, you are nothing more than an independently urinating parasitic humunculus"

that's MR croc too you
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 14:59:43 (EDT)
if pigs had wings...
they wouldn't bump their chops a hoppin'
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 14:43:04 (EDT)
A Modest Long-Pig Proposal.
Lester
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 14:22:17 (EDT)
i'm taking credit for all pork posts
the unknown porker
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 14:12:45 (EDT)
I'm DEE-licious!

USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 13:48:07 (EDT)
how's about a receipe for long pig loaf?
how to cook long pig...
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 13:43:38 (EDT)
No, that was not my long pig handiwork. I cannot take credit for that. It was muy funny, though. And the best drummer thread...I thought I was going to soil myself. Wait, I think I may have....
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 13:28:44 (EDT)
A cool flash game.
Lester
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 13:13:11 (EDT)

Lester
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 13:07:55 (EDT)
"My endless ability to bury bloggers with a thesaural laden onslaught of obfuscation, obscure Joycean references, and my incessantly inferior spalling send all pretenders to my throne running for the comfort of their Viagra e-mails."
THIS genius
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:57:47 (EDT)
game on
The Cousin
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:53:37 (EDT)
gramcheck- if they CAN spoof
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:38:28 (EDT)
Would you believe "the bestest bloggar challenge"? If they bongo spoof the guitarest thread, I thought it appropriate to once again seize the low ground.
I croc myself up sumtimes
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:36:54 (EDT)
like sol don?
kasey keller
- Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:35:36 (EDT)
This one's for dexter. Sorry icouldn't make the special sale. my box looks like it needs a good weedin' too...
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:23:47 (EDT)
Welcome home, Kid. Did I detect a bit of your "long pig" handiwork earlier?
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:17:22 (EDT)
Yeah, I'm here MJ. I am back on full-time status. It's good to return home....
The Kid
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:15:43 (EDT)
nice spelling, "DON"
Telestar
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:08:41 (EDT)
It seems that ol' Teddy would rather NOT play than play for trusty Spurs.
Don <salt@wound.com>
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:06:49 (EDT)
Gee this is a long feild trip. I'm all out of juice boxes. Is BJ® transfering schools?
Don
Johnston School District, USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 12:05:02 (EDT)
I hope ack's okay.
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:57:47 (EDT)
Dear lord on high. I'm having to much fun shitting in somebody else's toilet. I've been neglecting my dear dear lurk. Croc dropped a few choice ones I see. Lee is a fucking master. KID! Are you back ?!!
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:56:20 (EDT)
Wait, who's retarded?
goude spalling
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:55:07 (EDT)
question: do you have to have been tarted before you can be retarted.
bore us
- Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:36:17 (EDT)
And this lame copycat attempt...
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:26:03 (EDT)
I am pissing my underpants one cubic litre...
BJ®
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:23:32 (EDT)
long
pig
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 11:16:19 (EDT)
Someone tell chong to go back to china on noise board. under "chinese rock"
Chong
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 10:44:13 (EDT)
Timmy seems to have staged a coup on the dicktaters
croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 10:32:02 (EDT)
the Biggie World is work well done...the Dictators is ALL little Timmy ALL the time...
Willard
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 10:19:20 (EDT)
Joe Sizzla very funny. I've noticed less ackack on the noise board. I suspect the Benny barrage was a bit much for him. Oh yeah, happy belated frikkin mothers day ya bunch of mothers
pappa croc
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 09:18:57 (EDT)
is this
on?
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 09:10:09 (EDT)
scroll down
heehee
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 01:53:25 (EDT)
The Cap'n needs lurker input. What w*rks for you? the "dictators" or the "big world" displays off the "shows" page?
BSTC
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 01:36:02 (EDT)
I want me mommy
Blankie
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 00:19:19 (EDT)
I want my freakish daddy.
Baby Blanket
USA - Monday, May 12, 2003 at 00:07:42 (EDT)
them threads is some funny sh!t...now who IS this smarmy fuck SIXSTRINGFUCKINGPIECEOFSHIT and what LAME ASS band does he "play" in?
Huey Long Pig
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 23:26:27 (EDT)
nice blouse, Joe...the Tampons rock!
Willard the Long Pig-Hearted
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 22:44:08 (EDT)
HO LEE Long Pig MEAT! Genius gif discovery by whoever unearthed it.
BJ®
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 20:46:59 (EDT)

bite me
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 18:19:37 (EDT)
Bye Bye Hoddle.
Teddy S <death@highbury.com>
- Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 15:59:51 (EDT)
Bye Bye Hammers.
Skint <death@ManU.com>
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 15:42:27 (EDT)
Suh-WEET! Look at my new blouse!

USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 14:42:03 (EDT)
Mom
Mother
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 12:47:34 (EDT)

happy Mothers day from the greatest Mothers EVAH

bore us
- Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 12:17:49 (EDT)
ingates=ingrates
A.F.M.
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 11:34:46 (EDT)
Fucking ingates kids of mine.
A Fucking Mother
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 11:34:14 (EDT)
Dear Lord on HIGH I just pissed my brown and yella's
Bro Hamm
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 01:31:22 (EDT)
I haven't had this much fun since 6th grade. Does it ever get old?
Scroll down
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 01:18:07 (EDT)
I wanted to talk to benny after the show but he said he wasn't sticking around for the non-rock portion of the show. I'm not allowed to drive so I was forced to stay. Also emoticons are fucking stuipd for idiots. It's like imagine you are super hot chick and have to hang around with ugly chicks from working at burger king any they are all gross.
Again-from the NOISE board
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 00:58:01 (EDT)
I can wipe the floor with that Seattle dude's client's chin (or lack thereof).
Mean Joe Greenwood
USA - Sunday, May 11, 2003 at 00:16:03 (EDT)
well fair lurkers, it's HOLE, MASS or bust for Willy n' the boys...Dave, don't worry I'll go easy on ya...stick to the guitar and someday you might be able to COMPETE with the likes of Benny Sizzler's talent...TALENT, I says. Good day good sirs, including you BJ.
my ghostly Willard
USA - Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 18:26:36 (EDT)
I promise. I didn't steal this guy's schtick. Just discovered it today.
Benny Art Dude
Middleblob, USA - Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 14:32:01 (EDT)
skinny and scary, evidently. that's why don's hands look like they're trying to block the attempted 'reach-around'
boris
- Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 09:49:42 (EDT)
My client has expressed remorse that he will be unable to take part in the world-famous Guitarest competition. Off the record, he mentioned that he was not thrilled at the prospect of getting beat like a rug by not one, not two, but three guitarests from Benny Sizzler. he briefly considered entering the competition as a drummer but his chances of being completely humiliated were much greater. He asks that you please take this opportunity to rock on. Thank you.
Dave Grohl's Agent
Seattle, WA USA - Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 09:35:57 (EDT)
I won't be blowing anyone! I'm not the one who offered to get below the human drunk tank if he bought a t-shirt.
Cong
USA - Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 07:51:08 (EDT)
You guys know big world plays tonight? Take it to the top yo!
Chang Pee
USA - Saturday, May 10, 2003 at 07:14:38 (EDT)
It ain't long, but it's SKINNY
The Index finger
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 23:42:07 (EDT)
chong has too much honor. just keep that guy in the rocket pic with don the HELL away from me. from don's expression, we know exactly where that other index finger was.
boris
ukrainus - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 20:58:15 (EDT)
"Crank that suck nob up to 11!! I'm ready to ROCK!!!! "
Choice ABF
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 20:56:31 (EDT)
"His penis was shortened by half. I don't know if it will ever work normally again, but he has not come back to work yet."
Okay, I give. What's his J*b?
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 20:52:27 (EDT)
hey bstc- it works fine when i use mozilla but i gotta right click when i use explorer- don't feel bad i think yer swell, too
clack attack is back
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 19:36:11 (EDT)
Boris, really? You really, really like me? I'm still so insecure. Clickity Clack told me it didn't work for it. Thank you for the code. I didn;t need it afterall. I'll have Chong blow you
BSTC
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 18:24:32 (EDT)
nice frame job there BSTC
bore us
ukrainus - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 18:12:24 (EDT)

light my lucky
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 17:45:30 (EDT)
no, this is ouch...
chorico chopper
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 17:35:52 (EDT)
ouch!
dems fighting words
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 17:15:40 (EDT)
Gave my parting shots on the threads for the evening.
two words- suck nob
LURKERS RULE!! I'm out((()))~~~~~~~

croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 17:12:32 (EDT)
Picked myself up a new toy. I plan to be dancing furiously to my own own techno jams in a matter of hours... sigh, if I can't be the best guitarEst, I may as well consign myself to the techno cut-out bin. check the samples at the bottom of the page if you aren't familiar with the 303 and 909.
croc got sum SERIOUS rhythm
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:56:38 (EDT)
This from the Noise BEST GUITAREST post...Fuck, i actually feel fucking bad now..."it's cool, don't worry about it. I understand that you are psyched and want to help with promo, that's all good. just measure it more carefully, then you could be more effective and not piss people off. and I agree- do not show this post to Joe. I don't like hurting anyone's feelings, as gods know I'm all cranky myself about music I'm working on and clearly he works *really* hard at what he does. I do respect his hard work. I was just responding to the belittling of Rich Gilbert, Roger Miller, et all... you just *don't* *do* *that*. anyway, it's all right.
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:54:42 (EDT)

the happy organist
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:54:13 (EDT)
That's BLANKIE to you, FRILLY. Hey, kanga's do it?
Duvet
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:52:48 (EDT)
i asked them if they wanted to share my nuts but they said they were busy
halfway to a threeway
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:45:28 (EDT)
well at least it's Friday...anyone seen BLANKET or that fat lip YUP?
Willard
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:42:25 (EDT)
DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BSTC
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:41:33 (EDT)
now the poster opens a new window+the pix work if you right click and open another new window
clickety clack
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:33:42 (EDT)
pics still ain't clickin
sum clicker
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:30:07 (EDT)
re: wrasslin' pic-Dear Lord on High
BSTC
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:13:19 (EDT)
Breaker 1-9. Do the pictures read off the "shows" link as requested? Over.
BSTC
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:12:48 (EDT)

gettin' ready to wrassle a croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:12:28 (EDT)
Actually, that is a vicious, vicious lie.
The Kid
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:07:56 (EDT)
BJ in from the meat for a post. croc, way to keep the posts on top.I added two as well. Nuthin' as funny as yours '"Annoy, Annoy!" Just shit to keep it alive. The Kid done and gone leave Quonset P? the place I want o be lain to rest? That's sad...
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 16:07:34 (EDT)
Kid i hear your a ladies man
Cute Chick <goddessnf@hotmail.com>
ma USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:56:29 (EDT)
and Lobster Newburg I haven't forgotten about you good sir
my little Willard
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:53:47 (EDT)
Bear Warning
The Forest Service has issued a BEAR WARNING in the national forests for this summer. They're urging everyone to protect themselves by wearing bells and carrying pepper spray. Campers should be alert for signs of fresh bear activity, and they should be able to tell the difference between Black Bear shit and Grizzly Bear shit.

Black Bear shit is rather small and round. Sometimes you can see fruit seeds and/or squirrel fur in it.

Grizzly Bear shit has bells in it, and smells like pepper spray.

bore us
ukrainus - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:52:31 (EDT)
fare thee well The Kid...fare thee well...
Quonset Hut With Eyes Willard
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:51:52 (EDT)
Hey croc, you might want to heed this advice....
The Kid
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:34:49 (EDT)
Hey, just letting y'all know I ain't dead. But I am fast approaching Willy's hygiene level after all this sweating and moving and dumpster diving...I'll be back to full time next Monday. Farewell, QP!
The Kid
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 15:28:27 (EDT)
Posted a couple more to keep the threads at the top of the board. It's approaching 3,000 views between the two threads. Do we lurkers know how to fvck sh!t up in our own g@y-@ss way or what? they may be arguing about who's best, but it's indisputable who rocks the counter.
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 14:18:26 (EDT)
Agreed. I gotta learn that alphabet bit, it definitely could come in handy
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 14:14:54 (EDT)
"game on,but first we drink a case o'bud a piece .......and then drive 2 and1/2 hours to the gig and smoke some of your dopey drummers weed and then we rock then drive your stupid ass home................welcome to my nightmare...........oh yeah learn your alphabet backwards zyxwvutrsqopnmlkjihgfedcba it helps..i can do it even loaded...really,,,,,,,,,, im a pro drunk...................."
The Only Taker with balls so far
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 14:04:49 (EDT)
from croc's own site.

USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 14:02:38 (EDT)
can someone anyone synopsize what the end result was/is from BJ's "best guitarEST" post? good/bad/indifferent?
Willard
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 14:01:00 (EDT)
Just spreadin' the good word.
A Benny Henchman
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 13:59:56 (EDT)
Hey Croc, I didn't know you started your own site.
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 13:55:52 (EDT)
damn the tripod nazis, it opened before. Oh well
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 13:31:54 (EDT)
Yo Lobster, I spotted this shot from your families last vacation.
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 13:30:30 (EDT)

normal was i, 'ere i had ear hair
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 13:26:00 (EDT)
Hey! Leave me out of it!
Lester
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:53:25 (EDT)
They're gonna have to start adding multiple
croc is a flamer
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:50:20 (EDT)
Just checked the hits- Most Annoying Band thread- 1901 hits!!! Best GuitarEst- 1001 hits!!! That blows away all the other threads.
check yo self
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:48:37 (EDT)
I hope you mean the gas.
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:46:09 (EDT)
FUCK ME! BJ off into the meat. Will check back before meat curtain closing time. Lurk on shitstarters.
Bj®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:45:42 (EDT)
croc getting a "pick me up" in the hospital by Lester

USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:40:02 (EDT)
nevermind, found the thread. That one I was signed in for (analbloodfart), there's still another one that just says guest that's mine too.
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:35:57 (EDT)
me getting a lap dance at the local bondage shop
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:33:31 (EDT)
Mouse comment most definitely mine. I forgot to log in first that's why no name. Which thread is that on I forget now?
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:32:36 (EDT)
PS-Croc, that was you telling some guy who didn't have the balls to download a song that the mouse was also on his family creast. I fucking died!
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:22:41 (EDT)
Mornin' WILLY. UUU BASTARD!!!!!! Did the OTHER band play last night? het chong, dod you start a new Foo Fighter's thread/ i couldn't find it.
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:21:51 (EDT)
a bit weird
top row right
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:18:20 (EDT)
The Foo Fighter's The Mean Joe post is GONE? But don't worry, the "STAIND" thread lives on...
STAIND
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:13:10 (EDT)
My response: You must be kidding me. You are in a foo fight cover band? How about you write some songs about what is impotant to you? Like how to put just enough salt on the fries or maybe how to hit on the girl who works the register but cant tie own shoes and drools all the time. Call yourselves the burger king queens. I bet that gets dave's attention. Also dont tell me who I can diss. just because I'm foreign don't mean I dont rock. I can see you guys now "Oh man we sound just like the foo fighters! This is so awesome! Who wants to be called Dave today? OK Roger gets to be dave but Nigel can be dave tomorrow."
Chong Kong
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:12:20 (EDT)

spider monkeyman and the temple of tammy faye
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:06:51 (EDT)
I think I dumped a second response on that board, but someone had been there before me. It came up on a search ala Benny.
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:05:10 (EDT)
wait a minute. was Willis professing no knowledge of the Pietasters?

croc dialing dundee
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:01:39 (EDT)
g'day lurk...it's a good day to DIE DIE DIE!!!
Willard
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:01:30 (EDT)
CROC?!! That was YOU on your first SOLO FIELD TRIP?!!!!! FUCKING GOD THAT"S FUCKING FUNNYY!! I CAN'T Stop laughing this morning. I just woke up and i'm already wasted. FUCK you fuckers are fucking funny!
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 12:00:12 (EDT)
A 20-year-old man described as having a fascination with explosives blew himself up after putting a home-made pipe bomb in his mouth, an inquest has heard
smoke dis, it's da bomb
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:59:02 (EDT)
But then THIS made me spit mountain Dew on my screen: "I have some good rich gilbert stories I could tell yu one of these times. Also one time i saw him drink a goldfish in beer. I told him we do that all the time and he says "Who cares what you people do? This isn't your country so don't tell me any of your lies!" He's real funny like that. Joke was on him though cause he threw up real bad and no chicks would talk to him anyway cause he was playing an accoustic and ignoring everyone at the party."
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:58:09 (EDT)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hey! I work at a Burger King, and im in a Foos tribute band (we all love you Dave!), and me and my mates ROCK!!! dont you go dissin! Unless this is one of you people....
Chong Gonna start some shit...
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:56:47 (EDT)
This is funny enough: "songs matter. vibe matters. the feeling a recording or performance gives you matters. that's all. notes and shit don't matter. "... " but over all, the songwriting is only tolerable at best, nothing mind blowing. sorry, wish I could tell you I was blown away by the dude's blazing fret fingers and songs, but I wasn't. I'd have to hear some other cuts to be sure, but frankly, I've had students of mine that were better." _Dakota from the NOISE board
BJ®
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:56:29 (EDT)
what you thought that was the first field trip?
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:49:14 (EDT)
Avril's crack habit revealed.
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:48:33 (EDT)
WTF is that Pietasters log? Who are the pietasters?
Bling
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:44:55 (EDT)
Pleae make me Chong Street Team Captain!
Blong
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:44:14 (EDT)
Third post down - from February?!?
Lester
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:19:24 (EDT)
The case of the messy poo.
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:04:44 (EDT)
Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Weapons of Mass Destruction http://modernhumorist.com/mh/0304/eb_wmd/
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 11:03:12 (EDT)
Chong is humbled by praise. But i am pretty damn funny. I think I'm hitting my comic stride right now. I will be making a public apperance at Pats Pub in providence tonight. Maybe i take stage and do my bit about airline food.
Chong
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 10:56:08 (EDT)
i like this band, also when i play pac-man i listen to firs lp od foo fighters. My main problem is that in america the chinese are not known as rockers but we will surprise you. We dont go crazy about elvis that belongs to the japanese. We like new rock like metallica and cream and the foo fighters. But one thing I foget to mention is that I hate posers. So don't be a poser because thats plain ignorant. Also it is a bad idea to try to rock if people know you work at wall-mart or burger king. But most of all BENNY SIZZLER ROCKS!!!
Silly foo
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 10:51:46 (EDT)
that spitfire post was the best message board post EVAH. much honor.
bore us
- Friday, May 09, 2003 at 10:51:24 (EDT)
KINSHASA, Congo (AP) - The rear door of a Russian-built cargo plane burst open as the aircraft was carrying police officials and their families across Congo, and 129 passengers were sucked out, airport officials said Friday.
OH Balls
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 10:14:40 (EDT)
I dropped so many bombs on logs this week I don't even remember where I made the mouse in the hand comment. Was that on the noise?
croc
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 09:49:36 (EDT)
Watch Mean Joe in action.
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 09:19:31 (EDT)
"What the hell is going on??? You friends with these modern icons? you must be total popular. Except for roger miller. "King of the Road" was pretty good but I think the guy in BENNY SIZZLER is probably better by now."
Lobster
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 08:02:01 (EDT)
I hate job. To early. Job has no honor.
Chong
USA - Friday, May 09, 2003 at 03:04:23 (EDT)
THIS FUNNY:"Guess the mouse in your hand is on the family crest too"
BJ
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 22:48:33 (EDT)
I like it. The zits go away when popped. Unlike in real life when you pop the thing and it gets filled up again several more times
Ack Knee
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 22:32:00 (EDT)
this is really gross...
zit poppin' game
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 21:38:41 (EDT)
I'm so fuckin' stoked. I just picked up my application for summer employment, nights and weekends as Junior Lotion Jockey at the Sun Tan Hut. Hope I get that mofo!!!
Tommy the Commie
East Main, USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 21:29:50 (EDT)
S-T-A-I-N-E-D, da.
boris
ukrainus, - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 20:21:20 (EDT)
You could outplay me on any day of the week, at any time of day............ It's spelt 'Guitarist', and not guitarest........You should learn to spell it since you do it so well...... P.s.: You're worthless and small, and nobody in here gives a fuck about how good you are or how bad you are at ANYTHING......You're just one more idiot on the member list......
From the Staind Message Board
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 19:42:17 (EDT)
Apology ------------------------------------------------------------------------ This morning I drink special pick me up with mix of red bull and Ulra Slim-Fast. Things go ok until about 6am when something go very wrong with chong. I run to honorable toilet and stay for hour and a half. I felt pretty bad about the whole thing so I apologized to the toilet. I have no honor.
This Deserves Second Read
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 17:39:39 (EDT)
ROBOWARU IS COMING FOR YOU!!!
soda nazis must fizzle
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 17:20:13 (EDT)
The Prince's pudding-throwing episode happened shortly after he sampled two locally brewed beers.
prince pud chucker
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 17:14:08 (EDT)
good gay day lurkers...good gay day...Willy off to BeanTown for OTHER band proclivities...good gay day to ye
my pretty Willard
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 16:13:14 (EDT)
Times are a'gettin' desperate in China.....
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:39:39 (EDT)
Bean Town here I come. If I'm not heard from, start with the noise posters as likely suspects. I'm out{{{}}}~~~~
roc-kin the boat
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:38:14 (EDT)
Hey Benny, I got yer best guitarist right HERE! and points to his crotch
froggy gone a courting
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:36:22 (EDT)
My ego has split from swelling into two seperate and distinct segments.

roc
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:33:17 (EDT)
Looks like Bagism is back.

Dildo Baggins- John Lennon Revival Committee
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:14:51 (EDT)
look like foo post went fooey from what I see
my foosballs hang to the left
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 14:11:47 (EDT)
anybody know of a hot jewish boy that humps Foosball tables?
prince spaghetti day
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 13:37:20 (EDT)
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAH
FUCK YEAH!!
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:40:44 (EDT)
hit the noise again for any trying to keep up.
roc
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:36:01 (EDT)
Dear Lord on High...WTF?!! Okay. Off into the meat. I trust that the shit will still be being fucked with by the trusty lurk. Will check back in before meat curtain closing time.
BJ
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:34:57 (EDT)
I don't need no rainbow mud splats

USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:31:44 (EDT)
HAHAHA!="anybody know of a hot klezmer band that does Foo Fighters covers?"
BJ
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:26:47 (EDT)

there are no words for this
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:25:07 (EDT)
The guy is EVERYWHERE!
Blanket
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:19:20 (EDT)
I will be on the Foo on friday. Must go home now and think of joke even funnier than "mysterians" joke.
Chong Lee
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:09:25 (EDT)
Why not take this show cross country...?
Airplane trip
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 12:03:53 (EDT)
Oops.
Lobster
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:59:32 (EDT)
willy, i have copious wood well in advance of that shining, glorious moment. my cousin did attend with his girlfriend, on my behalf. he is/was a big crowns and jason fan (as is bore us but whatever). his exact review of benny, as pasted from an IM conversation that bore us saved for this moment: "they were weird. i didn't go expecting jason's band to be so punk. benny sizzler was definitely weird. not bad. funny weird. they look like they need food. the singer guy's good. you know that lady? really? she said some TRULY funny shit. she's definitely got balls."
snore us
ukrainus - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:58:48 (EDT)
fucking grinning Chong at center of blur fuckin' funny @ss sh!t
my brave willy
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:58:01 (EDT)
that's the fucking Cask of Amontillado, Geno...I knew that would throw your @ss-crack for a loop
E. A. Poe
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:56:36 (EDT)
Attn: lurkers-with Borash help SOON pix of last show will be readily viewable.
BSTC
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:54:02 (EDT)
It was the fucking casque of montiablo I fucking swear!
Geno
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:52:24 (EDT)
hey Bugsy, that sh!t you sold me at the Benny show was weak...the drugs too
MBW
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:51:19 (EDT)
Doris, some Day you will make a Benny gig and bear witness to the patented judo/dance moves of the best damn guitarEST in the original 13 colonies
MBW, that's "my brave Willard"
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:49:49 (EDT)
I would have went to your show last weekend but I couldn't figure out how to get in the Met. One entrance was bricked over the other had a dumpster in front of it. So I just sold some of my brown acid to losers milling around.
Drugsy
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:48:25 (EDT)
this FUNNY: I heard their next release is a split with Question Mark and the Mysterians.
Fucking FUNNY!
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:48:21 (EDT)
EP cretin: redundant. Rumford slum: redundant. "yes willy bore us will definitely be at the gig": nonexistent.
bore ASS
ukrainus - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:45:15 (EDT)
ok Quonset Kid, hang tough on the Cumby tip...where's the rock Lobstrocity? and Chong? BLONG!
my brave Willard
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:40:50 (EDT)
roc with his g@y-@ss egg

The bird, as it appears in Arabian Nights, is described by Sinbad as, "A bird of enormous size, bulky body and wide wings, flying in the air; and it was this that concealed the body of the sun and veiled it from the sun." In the account of Marko Polo the wingspan of the roc was 16 yards and the feathers 8 yards. The bird is usually described as being white. The egg of the roc is said to be over 50 yards in circumference.

roc the (not so) mythical wonder
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:37:31 (EDT)
go E,P! Swedish fish
O.L.Shroeder
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:36:36 (EDT)
for the E>P cretins, let me suggest the stuffed Quahogs-Fridays only-or I'll beat you with a roundhouse wallet tit
Ole Lady Shroeder
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:35:21 (EDT)
I'm here! I will be checking in sporadically all day, though, as my company vacates the confines of lovely Quonset Point and seeks refuge in middle-class heaven: Cumberland. Fear not, brave Willard-I have not forsaken you.
The Kid
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:29:39 (EDT)
Chong numba one fan; croc...rock; Doris...bore us; BJ...best gitarEST; Don...Ron; Furze...blur see?; and little Timmy...oh little Timmy; Lester...rock lobster; where's the fresh faced KID?
my Willard
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 11:14:54 (EDT)
At least you dont live in east providence.
Chong
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 10:58:55 (EDT)
I live in the Rumfud slum two blocks from the Wannamoisett CC clubhouse.
croc from down the bloc
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 10:55:30 (EDT)
I live on classy side of rumford. Near crugnales bakery and rumford farms where the owner tells me that Mountain Dew is not actually soda and is supposed to be flat.
Chong
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 10:21:26 (EDT)
I vote for MJ®!!!
Furze®
USA - Thursday, May 08, 2003 at 10:20:25 (EDT)
Rumfud? Hope you're not drinking the water here. That could definitely disru